The Journey Forward | ONC 2023 Version

9. A Second Wedding Night

"You are trying to avoid returning. It has to be something." I looked at his determined brow and knew I had to give him enough of the truth to satiate him.

"You know that neither of us wanted this marriage," I began, and he nodded but squeezed me reassuringly. I laid my head on his chest. Not looking at his eyes would make this easier. "I attempted to kill myself before we met." I felt his arms stiffen, but he didn't say anything. "Your Aunt Song supplied me with the reason and the way. She told me of your protests and your brother's happy marriage. Somehow, she knew I was Bibi, even though he did not."

"I told her," he admitted into my hair. "I investigated you before our marriage and found out you had lived with your grandfather for several years while my brother studied with him. It wasn't hard to piece together that Bai was Bibi, and the woman I was bound to marry had stolen my brother's heart."

"And he had mine," I admitted, though it was only partially true. He had possessed Bai's heart, not mine. I didn't look up, and his arms didn't slacken, so I continued. "Something changed when the poison failed to kill me." I couldn't tell him that it had worked, that Bai's body and soul had died that night, but some mysterious force had reversed the process and implanted my soul. I wasn't ready to have that conversation. "And when I met you, my mind never dwelled on your brother again. But Auntie Song attempted to finish what she had begun. She poisoned my tea several times until finally I fled with Mei to my parent's house and asked my mother to unblock my heart stone."

"Why did she want you dead?" he whispered almost to himself.

"I hope it was to protect you. Possibly she loves you so much that she didn't want you to be part of my melodramatic story."

"I have never been that close to my Aunt. She returned to the manor after Mei's marriage to my brother from her service with the Empress."

"Do you think the Empress might have wanted me dead?" I pulled away from Bao's chest and looked into his eyes.

"I doubt you have ever crossed her mind," he reassured me. I wasn't entirely convinced, but it was enough.

"So, I am afraid that if I return with you, your Aunt will try again."

"But I will be with you to protect you, and your cultivation is so much higher now than it was then. You could heal anything she throws at you."

"Possibly." I wanted to believe him, but something still felt wrong about the entire situation. Something more was at play than just Auntie Song's resentment. During my time away, I formulated many theories about who my enemies were, but I didn't mention them to Bao.

"I will protect you," Bao insisted as he stood up, lifting me with his motion and settling me down in his abandoned chair.

"I know." I knew he would try, but if things were as complex as I feared, I wasn't sure if he could keep me safe.

"Here." He handed me one of the packages, and I spied red cloth in it. I squealed when I revealed the ornately embroidered robe filled with cheeky dragons flying in circles around each other.

"This is lovely!" I exclaimed as I folded it and put it back on the table. He lifted it and handed it back to me.

"It is for you. I want you to wear it tonight."

"Tonight?"

"Our first wedding night is a memory I want to erase from your mind. Even more now than when I ordered this robe. Marry me again before we return to the capital."

"Bao, it isn't necessary. I am already your wife."

"It is necessary. I want you and the world to know I love my wife." My heart stopped at his declaration.