Ever Lost

4

"Oh sweet saints, she actually came?" Silvia spat. The doors opened gently as a girl with long black curls and bangs, dark brown skin and soft eyes, entered the room. The whole room quieted for her, she wore a deep blue gown with diamonds and what I assumed to be sapphires, her lips were coated black and glossed over, her eyes were the darkest shades of brown, nearly black but under the light they shined like sweet chocolate. Her eyes were lined with black paints and her lashes were long, she looked reluctant, but resigned. She waited not for her presence to be accepted and hurried to her seat with her friends. Audrey had come, and every angel was bound to be pissed about it. Even worse, Audrey had come and shown all of them up in their own colors. How distasteful, yet it brought a smile to my face.

Once all the strays had found their way to their seats, the prayer commenced. We recited it twice, a second verse added in for the blessed and then, awaited for our food to be brought out. Tonight's dish was seafood, we marked off on our menus which of the options we wanted, and they were brought to us by the waiters. I opted for snow crab and shrimp with a side of vegetables and mashed potatoes. Silvia marked off her dish on her menu and began the rant of the century. The rant to end all rants, honestly. "I can't believe this." She started, making me wonder when it would ever end. "They actually made us recite a verse for her."

"We recite verses for the blessed every year." I replied. "Not for trash like her, look at what she's wearing." Silvia snarled. Oh, I noticed, everyone did. She was one of the best dressed people in this room, one of the last to enter, and of course, the blessed. It was hard not to notice. "She looks fine." I said.

"Be serious, Apollo. She looks like shit." I looked up from the table, my eyes met Audrey's as she shamefully turned her head around. She had heard Silvia, and her insecurities were plastered on her face. I felt a twinge of guilt sitting beside Silvia now. "Shut up, Silvia." I muttered. "No, someone needs to tell her- she needs to be humbled." Silvia argued. One of Audrey's friends turned around and laughed before turning back to her table.

"Saints, Silvia it's not that serious." Lyan groaned. Lyan and I were one in the same, it was no wonder we were roommates. Silvia blushed bright red with embarrassment, "it absolutely is."

"And what do you plan on doing about it?" I asked. Silvia bit her lip, genuinely considering the question. It kept her quiet, so I let her think on it. "I can't believe you aren't more outraged." Trey said. "You needed that blessing more than any of us." I cringed. Even if it was true, I doubt one measly offering would be enough to atone for my crimes. I sighed, "It wouldn't have been good enough." Trey frowned, "But it's a place to start if you ever want your halo back."

In truth, part of me didn't. I saw how the others were bound by their duties. We were literally bound by shackles to be holy, in an odd way it was my sins that set me free. It felt taboo to admit so I kept it to myself. I didn't need to be ostracized from my friends more. I was still an Angel even if I was a fallen one, and I was not about to sit through the new year getting looks from other angels. I could do without Silvia conjuring up long rants about me.

I looked over at Lyan for help, but he simply shrugged. It surprised me that he agreed, but it was reasonable. Most angels had petitioned for me to get my halo back and when that failed, they started trying to get me to atone for my sins. I tried to at first, but after a while I felt like a suck up and stopped. Finally, the waiters brought out our food. It was fresh, and steaming, delivered to us on a silver platter. I grinned as my platter was placed in front of me and removed the lid, the steam escaping into the air. I groaned in excitement, taking a crab leg in my hand, I tore it apart and cracked open the leg, the meat came sliding out. I squeezed lemons into my butter and dipped the crab meat in it, stuffing the crab meat in my mouth. I sighed with pleasure as the flavors traveled through my mouth leaving me satisfied. "It's better than sex." I remarked. Lyan laughed out in agreement. Silvia scowled, "Degenerate."

I slurped up the broth of my seafood soup, a little disappointed I didn't get crabs instead. The soup had bits of crab in it, but nothing compared to authentic crab meat. Emerson handed me one of her crab legs, in obedience to the deal we'd forged in year 9. The deal we had come up with was that we'd share our meals, and so there was a separate bowl for her, filled with half my soup, and a separate plate for me, with half her seafood platter. Mason laughed, "You're both better than me. I don't have half the heart to share my food."

"You don't have a heart at all." Emerson demurred. Mason stuck his tongue out at her before returning to his platter of shrimp. I hummed, slurping up more of my soup. My cheeks burned as they salivated, the seafood soup was a longtime favorite dish of mine, and I tended to pick it without considering any options, leading me to tonight's food-based predicament. My ears caught on the angel girl's sly tongue. Never had I seen her before. She was bitter and her words were harsh, no creative insults she was just purely mean making comments from my clothes to the way I ate. I felt myself unraveling at the seams to the needle of her mouth. It didn't surprise me Apollo was sat with her, they hated me the same and I, them. Emerson eyed me, "Are you okay?"

I nodded, tuning the girl out again, "Just tired." Emerson accepted the answer, dipping her spoon into my soup and taking an extra bite. "You snake!" I scowled. She giggled, reaching over for another, I slapped her spoon away. "Better than me." Mason loudly repeated. I sighed, finishing up my meal. The rest of the night went off without a hitch, thankfully. We all returned to our dorms without delay once dinner was over. I waited up for Alice to finish her conversations and we left together, discussing the trivial conversations we had that evening. I left out the details of my panic attack and the angel girl, the note and the locket. When we made it back to our dorms I wasted no time cleaning myself up and heading off to bed. Tomorrow was the start of Club Rush and I'd need all the rest I could get.