Bitter (wlw) (teacherxstudent)

thirty-four

I faintly nodded, forgetting anyone else was in the room for a second.

"Maybe you can all look into it and we can discuss it in the next lesson" she said, taking me back to the reality of the classroom.

Trying to hide everything just led to my heart beating faster than it should have been, and my face feeling completely flushed. But hopefully Mei wouldn't notice.

"She sounds like she knows the feeling well" she whispered to me.

"Or maybe she just has a passion for Romeo and Juliet" I suggested, knowing I wouldn't even believe it if I was the one hearing what I said.

"I don't know. But whoever it is she's thinking about, they're lucky as hell"

"Yeah, the luckiest" I mumbled, still smiling to myself. I couldn't believe I was the person who led her to say those things in front of everyone.

And the secrecy of being the only one aware of it in that classroom gave me a sense of intimacy that made the situation feel even more special.

After that I just wanted to run to Sam immediately after the lesson, but I unfortunately had work. It was going to be my first shift with Maya since everything happened, and I felt slightly nervous about it, but I didn't want to bother Sam by bringing it up.

I knew it'd inevitably be awkward but I didn't know Maya well enough to imagine how she'd act.

"Hi Ellie" she said as she walked in the shop, weirdly on time. She didn't look pissed or annoyed or any other negative way.

"Hey" I awkwardly said. "How's it going?"

"All good. You?" she joined me behind the counter.

"I'm fine" I smiled lightly.

What felt like ages but was probably just a few minutes of silence passed as we got ready for the busy afternoon, a moment which usually involved some small-talk.

"I hate these stupid Valentine's day special drinks" she suddenly scoffed, pointing towards the menu resting on the surface. I couldn't understand if she was genuinely expressing hatred towards them or was implying something else.

"Barely anyone orders them anyway" I shrugged, really hoping I wouldn't say anything wrong.

"Well, if anyone orders one you're gonna be the one who makes it then" she jokingly raised her hands.

I couldn't really tell if pretending nothing had happened was her coping mechanism, or she really was totally unbothered by it. She did act less talkative than usual, but it wasn't as bad as I'd predicted in my head.

And also, all of the talk about those drinks led me to think about something that'd been in the back of my mind for a while. Valentine's day was coming up in a few days and I'd started to definitely overthink about it. I had no idea if Sam was the kind of the person who'd appreciate celebrating the occasion or didn't really care.

I wanted to buy her something for sure, but I didn't know what gift would be acceptable. And maybe going on a date would be nice, I'd received my first paycheck and had some money to do that, but I didn't know what kind of date would be adequate for the occasion.

In my previous relationship I'd always been the one to receive the gifts, even if I would have rather not because of how corny they'd always be, and never felt the need to do something for him.

Maybe, being older than me, Sam would find celebrating silly or childish. Or maybe she was expecting something.

As soon as I got home I texted Vic, because knowing me I just wouldn't stop thinking about it if I didn't talk to anyone.

you: i need help

vic<3: should i be worried

you: not really
you: i just realized i have no idea on what one should do for valentine's day because i never felt like celebrating our relationship with what's his face

vic<3: oh lmao
vic<3: is sam a romantic person?

you: yeah, i guess so. but like, maybe a 30 year old doesn't wanna celebrate valentine's day anymore???

vic<3: i'm sure she'd appreciate a small gesture, though
vic<3: maybe you could frame a picture of the two of you? you're good at doing creative stuff to make it look cute :') and get her some flowers too

you: that sounds appropriate. i like it

vic<3: you're welcomee lol

I hadn't even thought of a framed photo, but it really sounded like the perfect gift. Simple but meaningful, cute, and it would require me to use my creativity. While I knew I was going to have to hear from Vic again for the flowers, her being the plant and flower expert.

I'd already said that I sometimes felt like Sam could read my mind, but I started to be fully convinced about it that evening, as I went to her place.

"So, uhm, Valentine's day is in a few days..." she randomly said as we had dinner.

"Right" I casually said, as if I hadn't just spent hours thinking about it.

"It would be nice to have dinner somewhere. Maybe in the same place we had our first date in. But I know it's a weekday and we both have to get up early the next morning so if you don't want to it's-"

"Of course I do" I cut her off, placing my hand on hers. "I'd love that"

"Yeah?" she smiled, her tired looking eyes lighting up.

"Yeah" I also smiled, feeling slightly stupid at being paranoid about her not wanting to do anything special that day.

"Why do you look...relieved?" she gave me a confused look. I just wasn't good at hiding my emotions as much as I tried. Or she was just really good at reading them on my face.

"I'm- I just thought you'd find Valentine's day childish and worried about it a bit too much" I visibly blushed.

"I mean. I've already told you how you sometimes awaken my youthful side" she shrugged. "Please try not to stress about things like these, though"

I immediately wondered if that meant that she didn't celebrate it with Maya, which would have made what she'd said earlier at work make sense.

"I'll try" I giggled. "I just want to always do my best for you"

"Your company is more than enough" she squeezed my hand.