The Story Of My (Ridiculous) Life

(4) payne-ful

"Ooh look! There's an amber alert for a Felix Rivers!" Niall flashed his phone at Harry, who plucked it out of his hands. It was then plucked out of his hands by Liam. They all tossed the phone to and fro, each of their faces morphing into one of suprise and shock as they glanced at the screen.

"Ah crap, they're on to us." He handed the phone to Louis, who looked at the screen and frowned before handing it back to Harry.

"That could've been Freddy Styles," Harry muttered bitterly.

"Oh well. Life happens." I chirped optimistically. He shot me an angry glare at the same time Felix shot me a smirk. I like to consider myself a glass half-full person but more often than not I was pretty glass half-empty.

"That wouldn't happen. Felix Styles, I mean. My mom hates you."

"Oh, come on. I'm sure your mom can't hate me that much!" Harry laughed, undermining Felix.

"Well, firstly, you kidnapped her son that she raised alone. Secondly, she has photos of you printed out all over her room-"

"See! That's nice-"

"She scratched out your eyes with a knife and then burnt a hole in your face. I never realised why until now. I always thought she was just some crazy obsessed hater."

"Girl boss," Louis said at the same time Niall muttered "Slay." #girlboss FR. I wondered if she had ash and debris floating around her house that she kept, or if she burned it neatly.

Harry's face opened and closed like a goldfish. Felix rolled his eyes and muttered something along the lines of I told you.

There was a sudden high-pitched shrill girly scream from the front. My stomach plummeted and everybody's heads snapped towards Niall and Liam, the drivers at the front. I sucked in a sharp breath.

Had our time finally come where we'd be killed by Niall's terrible driving?

"They're stopping everyone and Felix's name and photo is posted all over signs!"

Never mind.

"Aww, people care about me!" Felix beamed.

"Nobody cares about me," I muttered sourly. If only my parents hadn't gone on holiday, perhaps someone would be looking for me right now. But instead I'm stuck in this dung hole while my parents are partying it up in Hawaii on a cruise.

"What's that smell in the air?" Louis asked, sniffing it. I looked at him in confusion. It smelled normal, aside from the faint pungent odour of male sweat.

"Jealousy. Also there's guys coming around and checking everyone's vehicles." I rolled my eyes and slumped down, sighing. I'm not jealous.

Ok, maybe I am a bit.

"That was savage, bro!" Niall exclaimed.

"Terribly funny. Really witty," I mumbled sarcastically. If I wasn't chained up in handcuffs or ropes or whatever, I would've folded my arms and slumped down.

"Can we focus on the situation at hand, please?" Harry asked everyone.

"No," I spat. I suddenly wanted to go home. Either that, or set alight the van with everyone inside it and watch it burn.

Harry angrily glared at me. "Shut up, Girl. I wasn't talking to you." I shrugged and he carried on.

"Here's what I'm thinking. We'll all head to the back, I'll sit with Finn-"

"Felix," he said, bitterly.

"-to make sure he doesn't try anything, and Girl can drive." He turned to me. "You know how to drive, right?"