âme soeur

chapter 46

Anika pov

Sitting close to the window looking the dark sky. The sky which helped me to calm my heart is just bringing more uncertainty.

Yesterday night I did something which is the horrible thing one could to do.
Specifically to whom you love.

But this was the best I could ever do for Shivaay. Past one month is not easy at all. What I thought completely opposite happened but one thing I released that I fallen for him. I love shivaay with my life.

He is my home where I want to go.
I want to go him when I feel helpless. I want him to pull me when I feel I am drowning  in darkness. I want him to hug me when there is no one for me hold. I want him to wipe my tears when I am crying. I want him to hide me from my this world when I am falling.

And I know he will do everything. He will do everything without a word. That's why I had to take promise from him. Because I know after knowing the whole truth it will hurt him. I know he feel the same I feel for him. We don't needs words to understand each other. He will be shattered. I know this.

And I don't want him to be broken. I know he must be hurt but he will accept this and move on in life. I just want his happiness nothing else. I want to him to live his life happily.

Not only shivaay I hurted every family member of his family. Because now I don't have rights to call his family mine. I just hope they will forgive me.

Two day ago I called gauri and said that I want to give surprise to Shivaay as I am coming to Mumbai. She is so happy to know that. I told her that I want to meet shivaay on beach. Atleast I will fulfill my one of the wish.

Before going to beach I met Om, Gauri and Ishaan for the last time. They were happy but I know how difficult is for me to control myself and I just can't let my self weak.Till the last moment Ishaan didn't leave me.

" Balii maa I am waiting for you come soon. "

His eyes were teary as he is waving his hand to say goodbye. I gave him kiss on forehead and left from there.

I was preparing myself because I know this going to be very tough but I have to do this not for me. But for Shivaay. I try to find the calmness and peace in water but it's just reminding me all the moments and everything that I shared with him. Few minutes more he is going to come here.

And before I knew I am in arms of the person for whom I am craving. I was numb  at that moment totally. I was controlling myself not to give up. But like every time my heart lose in front of him.

His eyes  were shining. He is so happy. That smile on his face.

I just hugged him tightly seeking all the warmth, peace, comfort, strength, love everything.

His happiness is reflecting on his face but I had to do this.

" You just have to say Anika "