Hermione pulled out her phone, going to Reddit as she sat across from Luna. "You were right! That pregnancy fic totally worked him up. He hasn't walked out of the room when Neville comes over for the last two times."
Luna nodded as she worked on her rare pair drawing on her iPad. "Maybe instead of internet stalking your husband, you just be more honest in the bedroom."
Hermione turned a little red as she glared at Luna. "Excuse me if some of us have trouble–"
"Saying vagina?" Luna interrupted. "You know part of a healthy relationship is saying what you want."
Hermione patted her red cheeks. "Shush. I will. I'm working on it. I read an ABO fic out loud to myself."
Luna paused and looked up interested. "Did you say all the bad words?"
"Well no–"
Luna gave a disappointed sigh, tapping on the red color with her drawing pen. "Doesn't count then. You know, I read a really good one recently."
"Oh, really?"
"Mhmm, a bit too naughty for you probably, but it was me and Charlie Weasley."
Hermione peeked over at Luna's drawing. "Charlie, huh? Well. You know there's not really that many with me and Harry. I mean, the last one was absolutely lovely but maybe a bit too dark for Harry. He's such a sweetie, you know."
"Well, I mean, readers kind of like you two very sweet. Except for a few –what was her name? Krystal Madros? Something like that."
"Oh, I know who you're talking about! I don't think I've gotten him to read hers, because he mostly sticks to AO3, you know." Hermione sat back, continuing to scroll. "Just look at this–I mean all these perfectly lovely story types getting thrown in the bin."
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"Hmm. Which ones?" Luna asked absently, working on her shading. She needed the freckles to be just right.
"Soulmate bonds! I mean, who can hate those?"
"It's a little hokey, Hermione."
"I like to think we were meant for each other. You know how hard it was—"
"Yes, yes fighting, death, dark wizards. I was there too, you know."
"I'm just saying I'm not opposed to some of these."
"Oh well, this one definitely," Hermione said as she continued reading.
"Which?"
"Nicknames."
"You don't like nicknames?"
"Kind of childish, aren't they?"
Luna paused and leaned forward to look Hermione in the face. "Are you telling me that if Harry called you babydoll and pulled you into the bedroom, you wouldn't like it?"
