Refusal

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Time was impossible to trace in the darkness, but I rebelled against him with hunger and silence so he could never enjoy the company Zeus had promised. I doubted he had chosen me just for conversation, but he hadn't touched me since that first day where he had helped me out of his chariot.

In those few moments where I trusted him, thinking his crime was a good-intentioned misunderstanding.

"I don't mind the quiet," he told me from across his table in the cavernous great hall.

Every night he set it with a spectacular feast, taking pains to serve me personally with a plate. I didn't know where the food came from—nothing could grow here as far as I could tell—but it was as wonderful as any display in the heavens.

"I only wish you wouldn't be so unhappy here. If there was something I could provide you, something I could give, I would. Anything in my kingdom is yours."

And yet his kingdom didn't have the sun. The Underworld was far from my mother, and the ones I held dear. I would never laze in the forest or chase the rivers ever again.

"I know you wonder why I stole you away," he continued.

"You don't know anything about me."

"I think I understand you more than most, Persephone," he said.

My eyes met his with a lethal rage, but he only seemed encouraged by my interest. It had been a week since I had so much as acknowledged him.

"I have seen you for so long, wandering alone in search of something you can't find with the nymphs or the ocean."

"I loved the meadows," I told him evenly.

"And yet they still weren't enough for you," he replied.

Sitting across from him at the most decadent table, I wondered what he might possibly know about starving. My fingers thrummed against the table as I considered him. He couldn't possibly know the dreams I had or, worse yet, the desires. I had never spoken them to anyone out loud.

"I took you because you were content."

"You took me because I was happy?" I demanded.

"No, I said content. It's the most horrifying way to live," he informed me. "At least when you have the capacity for so much more."

"You think you know me because you've watched me, but you've never had my mind. And you never will."

"Your body speaks it often," he replied.

I scowled at him, but he there was no humor in his face. It was as if he were just stating simple facts of the universe.

"I also took you because Zeus planned to give your hand away to Ares or Apollo soon and I lied before. Being content is not the most horrifying way to live."

I was shocked by the revelation, and he studied my face that I had laid far too open to him. The thought of being the wife of Ares sent a tremor through my body, which apparently betrayed me often.

Ares was wild and angry, in and out of a mad affair with the goddess of love herself. My life would have been one of jealousy and violence in the name of untamed passions. Apollo likely would have bored of me, and turned towards my humiliation for entertainment. I had seen that before. Maybe he would dangle me from the skies until my mother bargained for my freedom. Much like I was sure she was doing now.

Yes, the gods were horribly cruel.

"I know I cannot ask anything more than your presence here. I am aware even that is too demanding. But if you have any grace for my lonely millennia, then please," he sighed. He didn't specify what he was asking, but he didn't have to.

He had been wrong to steal me as his wife and he was wrong to plead with me now. But he didn't mention his kindness in sparing me a marriage with the gods or act as if I were indebted to him. He could have likely forced my hand in marriage in the name of heroism, but he hadn't done that either.

Hades was strange to me, as if he couldn't fully decide whether to be cruel or kind.

A reluctant part of me knew that it seemed like he was cruel although he desperately didn't want to be. Being alone in this place must have driven him mad.

"I can't be your wife," I told him finally. "But if it's true you only want my company, then I will give it to you."

Before he could speak I continued. "Until my mother wins my freedom. Then I'll see her strike you down and I won't be sorry."

"Of course." he replied. But his eyes twinkled.

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