For my sister | Negan |

10 - Lucille is hungry

We all sit around the dinner table awkwardly without eating anything, because Negan insits we wait for Rick, even though nobody knows when he'll show up again.

A million thoughts run through my head while we wait. Mostly I'm worried about what Negan's going to do to punish Carl and Ella for what they did. He'd forget about everything if I came back with him and became his wife, but he hasn't told me what he'll do now that I turned him down. He said that maybe he should kill someone to prove his point. That can't happen.

I try to meet Ella's eye, but she keeps them firmly averted from me. If I wouldn't be so worried about what Negan will do, I'd be furious. What was she thinking, risking her life like that? Risking all our lives, for that matter. Did they really think that they could kill him?

It hits me again. They went there to kill him. He said they killed two guards. I know that Carl and his dad and the others have had to do horrible things out there to survive. But my sister isn't a killer. She couldn't have killed those guards. Right?

I just want to talk to her, but I can't because Negan doesn't allow any of us to leave the table. His mood seems to sour by the minute as time passes by and the food grows cold. He taps his fingers impatiently on the table and keeps looking at the door like he's expecting Rick to show up any second. We all keep our eyes firmly away from him while we wait.

Suddenly Negan slaps the table, startling everyone out of their stupor.

'I'm done waiting for him', he says, sounding annoyed. 'I don't know where the hell he is, but Lucille...' he picks up his bat and places it on Rick's chair, '...is hungry.'

Since Ella won't look at me, I make eyes at Olivia who's at the other side of the table. We're both clearly thinking the same thing. This man is batshit crazy.

'Carl, pass me the rolls', Negan orders. Carl doesn't respond. I look up hesitantly and see him glare at Negan defiantly. These kids really will be the end of us.

Negan doesn't seem impressed by Carl's murderous gaze.

'Please', he says dryly. Finally, Carl gives in and hands him the basket of bread rolls. Negan starts to eat, seemingly entirely unaware of any discomfort amongst his fellow diners.

'Hm', he says, smacking his lips. 'That is some good pasta if I do say so myself.'

Then he looks around the table before he takes another bite.

'You guys don't like it or something?'

To avoid pissing him off more, I decide to take a bite. Though I can barely get it through my throat, I compliment him on his cooking. If there's any chance left of getting him to go easy on the kids, I have to take it.

'It's great.'

Ella finally looks at me, but only to throw me a look of contempt.

Kiss-ass, she mouths at me.

I feel a surge of rage that I can only barely control at that. How dare she cuss me out after everything she's done? I'm trying to repair her damage here.

Negan's eyes switch from me to Ella and back again. He must have seen our little exchange.

'Thank you, Christina', he says. 'Though it's not nearly as good as the dessert I had in mind. Unfortunately, that fell through.'

I hold on tightly to my fork as I look at him. Really, he's going to tell everyone that he wanted to make me his wife?

'What's that supposed to mean?' Ella asks him, only a slight tremble in her voice.