Aleatory Cote One-Shots

Christmas Date

It was Christmas Eve, so maybe I should go pick up a girl. According to Google-sensei, Christmas Eve is the most romantic holiday to confess, so as a normal sophomore I guess I could try experiencing it.

It was currently 6:30 A.M, so I rose up from my bed, got off the bed, and T-posed in order to assert my dominance (I'm not sorry). I took some strawberry ice-cream from the fridge, sprinkled some nutritious cereal on it, and ate it for breakfast. I've been trying every type of meal you could think of ever since I entered this school, which is always an interesting experience.

After finishing my breakfast, I brushed my teeth, because I'm a normal human being that brushes his teeth after breakfast. I took a shit, took a shower, and put on some clothes. To go with the Christmas spirit, I even put on a red shirt. I put on some beige corduroy pants, and a grey fleece jacket for some warmth, making sure it's protecting the Christmas spirit. Since it was early, I decided to head to just walk around.

After greeting my favorite dorm receptionist and heading out the door, I noticed a moderate layer of snow covering the entire campus. Last winter, I ate too many snowflakes and got explosive diarrhea, so I decided to tone it down this time.

Since this school is in Tokyo, global warming will cause a disruption in the stratospheric polar vortex in the Artic, making this winter just slightly more chilly than the last. It wasn't enough to call for gloves though, so I put my hands in my jacket and trod around on the snow.

I walked to a bench, cleaning the snow off of it to make space for me to sit. I pulled out the school-issued phone and started playing 4D chess against an A.I. If the school allowed outside contact, I could've cyberbullied random people, but it's too bad I can't.

Around ten minutes later, my appointed girl finally arrived. She had on a light yellow blouse and a red skirt that was way too short for winter, but I could see her thighs so who cares.

It's ironic how initially, she came to this school to expel me, and now I'm going to confess to her. Feels like a cliche rom-com or some shit. Well, I might as well experience adolescence to its full potential while I still can.

"Good morning Ayanokouji-senpai, did something happen for you to call me out this early?" Nanase asked.

"Yes, Nanase, it's quite important. Being the smart girl you are, you can figure it out, right?" She cocked her head to the side and pondered about my question. She reminded me of a cute puppy for some reason.

"No Senpai, I've been observing the students in my year and have confirmed that none of them are trying to expel you."

"Wow, how concerning of you, do you have a crush on me or something?" I deadpanned.

"Um, I-"

"Because I have a crush on you. Will you go out with me on this delightful Christmas Eve?" I hope that wasn't too blunt, but I trust in Google-sensei.

Nanase blushed in shock, and her sapphire eyes sparkled like a puppy's. She looked down at the ground and paused for a bit, considering her next words.

"I'm glad you think of me that way, but shouldn't you find a better date? I have no experience in this. . ."

"Nanase, look at me." She raised her head, and I looked her straight in the eyes. "You're the one I have a crush on. Besides, I have no experience as well, so why don't we learn about this whole 'love' thing together?"

"You're really good at charming girls, aren't you senpai? Well, I'd be happy to go out with you!" Huh, picking up girls was easier than I thought. Don't know why everyone seems to struggle with it so much.

"Right, what do you think we should do?" I asked. It was best to plan out your date with the other person in order to ensure things go more smoothly.

"Hmm, how about we go. . .Christmas shopping!" Nanase exclaimed. Ah, of course, the classic shopping spree that all girls are addicted to. "What do you think Ayanokouji-senpai? Oh, I mean, Kiyotaka?"