Strings Attached • JIARA•

20

JJ's POV:

I woke up to Kie's alarm. I was so confused why and then I realized I was in her bed. She was awake and I slowly woke up and realized we totally fucked last night.

She was totally freaking out and I felt so guilty. I remembered nothing from last night. She was actually super worked up about it. She was crying. It made me feel worse. I should have stopped it but I don't even remember starting it.

She was sitting up in bed and she didn't even bother to cover her chest with a blanket. I'd usually totally take advantage of that and stare at any girls boobs but I wasn't interested in her body. I cared way more about how she was feeling.

I promised this would stay between us. I gave her a hug and I got up and got dressed. I didn't want to leave. I wanted to comfort her and stay in bed with her all day.

I got in the shower and saw Kie left hickeys all over my body. Luckily, my clothes covered them up. I wasn't going to make a big deal about it because Kie already felt like shit over it.

We headed back to OBX and Pope sat by me on the plane. He could tell something was up.

"Dude, you can tell me whatever it is"

"Kie and I went out together last night. It was just as friends. Then we smoked weed and that's literally all I remember. We woke up in bed together"

"Dang, she has a boyfriend"

"I know, Pope. She feels like shit and so do I. But we don't remember even doing it"

"So maybe yo my didn't do anything"

"No, we definitely did..." I said as there was way too much evidence

"Gross... I don't want any details" Pope said which made me laugh

I put my headphones in looked at the pictures from the trip. I took a few of Kie last night. Those 'She thought the view was pretty was I thought she was prettier'

We were in the hot air ballon and she was admiring the view and so was I, her. Shit. I'm still totally in love with her and she'll never know because I'm never going to tell her. She doesn't love me back so it's not worth mentioning.

We finally got back home. Everyone went back to school. I was alone again. I was staying at the Chateau because I didn't want to see my dad. I was saving all my money to buy a house. It wasn't going to be much. Just a small house on the cut.

I spent two weeks just busy with work. I was trying to get over Kie. I've always loved her. It was never going to work

Over the next few weeks, I just worked a ton and found myself each night looking at all the pictures I had with Kie. She was so fucking perfect. I missed her. I missed her in ways that I shouldn't. But more importantly, I missed her as my friend.

Things were never going to be the same between us. I don't think we would ever be able to be friends like we were before. It would always be awkward between us. I don't know how to fix this. I can't go back and not sleep with her. I can't change the past.

I found myself drinking a lot more to numb my thoughts. Especially tonight after what I saw on Kie's story. She was laying in bed with Dylan who was shirtless. I missed being the guy she'd lay in bed with.

I was wasted and I called Pope. I needed his advice about what to do.

"Hey" Pope said answering the phone

"Fuck, I love her.. I fucking love her" I said into the phone

"I know, we all know. But you don't need to tell me. You need to tell her"