I have to admit it... I am addicted to attention. I dont know why, but I fucking love it. So much, that in that moment I care less of the others.
Like... there is a guy at school that obviously likes me. But I dont like him that way... but every time he gives me attention at school I am happy and my confidence ist boosted. But when hes around and doesn't give me attention I am upset. I crave it. But I dont like him at that way at all. Only when he doesn't give me attention I start "fake crushing".
And i know very well that this behavior is toxic as hell....
Because right after that I feel the guilt. I know I am unsing him...
I know what would be if he found out or actually started to have real feelings for me. I would break his heart just like mine got broken so many times
