Hurts so good

CHAPTER TWENTY-SEVEN||AIDEN

"And the truth is, you're not shielded from pain, you're just numb to it. I mean think about it, when you were forced to switch personalities, the pain of your parents death didn't just magically go away. You didn't need to be the grim reaper to survive. You survived on your own." I add.

Cassius picks up. "And you will continue to survive. we can't imagine the pain you must be going through but staying like this won't help, bug. I can't promise to take your pain away because I don't think I can but I do promise to never hurt you again. Just come back to us."

Her defenses are crumbing down. We're getting through to her. we just need to keep going. As if sam reads my thoughts, he steps up beside me. "I haven't known you that long and I still don't know you that well but I was in pain for a long time too. There's no doubt in my mind that if I was able to do what you can do, I would have. I would have shoved the pain deep down and let rage consume me too. But I was alone. I had no one. No one to love me. No one to save me. No one until you. I know you have a lot of pain Amaris but you have a lot of love too. You had to heal by yourself when you were little but you have us now. Let us help you, please."

Amaris inhales and exhales a shaky breath. She closes her eyes and does it again. And again. And again. Her body relaxes and her hands drop to her side. I should let her do this on her own but She looks like she's in pain, like she's fighting herself. Before I can stop myself, I pull her in my arms and hold her head against my chest. It takes a minute before she relaxes into me. Her hands wrap around me tightly as if she's scared to let go and she sobs. 

I run my hands through her curls. "It's okay princess. It's okay." She holds me tighter and cries harder. I panic at how much she's crying for a second before I realize that this is the first time Amaris has genuinely cried without shutting down.  She's crying for years worth of pain.

*****

"Here, baby." Cassius says and Amaris gently removes her face from my chest to look at the water bottle he has in his hand. She looks at him and although I can tell he's happy to see her, there's still hurt in his eyes. Amaris must see it too because her face paints with guilt. They stare at each other for what feels like forever and I have to nudge her to take the water from him. 

It's been an hour since Amaris started crying and she must be dehydrated by now. She reaches out to take the water from him and gives him a sweet smile. "Thank you."

"Do you still want to kill the doctor?" Cassius asks and I look down at her. 

She looks at the trembling man and shakes her head. "He was only doing what my aunt asked him to do. I didn't find anything about him being dirty while looking in to him." She says. "you should really think about the company you keep though Doc, those guys you hired are some bad men."

The doctor adjusts in his chair and fixes his glasses. "Oh well in all honesty, I don't really have any protection. When I heard someone was looking to come kill me, a client of mine offered his men as protection. I probably should have done my homework." he says, smiling coyly.

The noise of fumbling at the door catches our attention. Milo quickly steps back into the position he was before and I move Amaris to stand behind me. A dark skinned man barrels through and Milo points his gun at his head while simultaneously closing the door behind him. The mans eyes go wide at the gun pressed to the back of his head and makes no attempt to move. 

Before we can question the man about who he is, Amaris shoots out from behind me and grabs Milos gun, disarming him in a single second. "Wha-" 

"Thanks boss." The man says, rubbing his head.

"Who the hell is this?" Milo asks and I'm wondering the same thing.

"This is Jerome. He works for me. Don't kill him." She says nonchalantly before taking the clip out of Milo's gun and handing it back to him. 

"Works for you?" I ask, walking toward him. The man must be threatened because he notices me and quickly hides behind Amaris. For a man that's about 6'0ft, he's pretty skinny. He taps Amaris's shoulder and points at me as if to make sure she notices me approaching. 

Amaris laughs and I almost stop in my tracks. I haven't heard that sound in a long time. I keep walking but I blink to make sure I'm seeing correctly. Have I told her how beautiful she is when she laughs?

"Yes Jerome, I see him." she says smiling. "Don't worry, he won't hurt you." 

"Don't be so sure. where did you find him?" I ask and she winces.

"welllll, he tried to rob me." 

"Amaris." I warn.

"I know, I know. No more stray dogs but he was starving. I felt bad for him and hired him instead. I needed a tour guide and someone to help me with the bodies. Jerome doesn't judge." she says, shrugging.

I sigh in defeat and shake my head at her. "What is it with you and broken people?" 

She smiles at me. "They make me feel whole."