Ain't it fun (Paramore/ Tayley fan fic)

Tell me where our time went

An; thanks for all the reads votes and comments it really means a lot to know that people enjoy my stories. I managed to update a bit quicker this time I hope. Hope you enjoy
Song title from pressure from paramores first ever album all we know is falling
Maia_fvk xx
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I never understood how it was possible to fall for someone so completely that you would die for them. The idea baffled me. How would you feel any better if you couldn't see them?

But yet, in a sense I was doing exactly the same thing for Hayley, without even really embracing the probability that I could die. Because if Ashley wanted me dead, he wouldn't have much trouble. He had followers, supporters, people who owed him favours. But he didn't kill me, that would be to simple. Killing was for someone who has outlived there uses and are a liability. I was still of use. I was probably the closest person on this earth to Hayley and it would be easy for me to influence her decisions. He wanted me to crack and then convince her to make up with him, to protect myself

But I wasn't a coward like him. Only a coward beats up his defenceless girlfriend, only a coward needs other people to do their dirty work. He was nothing but a coward, a coward who was feared. To many that doesn't make sense but if you think about it all the most feared people throughout our lives are cowards

This was what my thoughts mulled over as I sat on the hospital bed, looking up to the grey ceiling with the plaster peeling off, as the nurse applied the gauze to the cut under my eye. I tried not to wince at the stinging sensation it caused or the coldness of the thick jelly but it was near impossible. The nurse didn't seem to mind, didn't shout when I shifted position. Her soft hands were gentle and tender as she cupped my face, tilting it from side to side to inspect for further damage but finding none. No matter how gentle her hands were, Hayley's were gentler. Hayley seemed to be the best at nursing me, on the rare nights I came back drunk and instead of getting mad, she would lead me to my room, keeping a small grip on my arm to stop me from falling on my face and tuck me in my bed like a small child. She would always make sure I was laying in my side and she would stay until I fell into an alcohol induced sleep. In the morning, I would awaken to the smell of bacon arising through the house, some aspirin with a tall glass of water and a note on the side which read ;
  Take these for your head and I'll meet you in the living room with breakfast when you wake up
Hayleykat xx

Hayley would leave me notes not only when I had a hangover, she left me them a lot. I wrote them too as we both had names. She was Hayleykat and I was called taybear. I can't even remember how we came up with the names but just the thought of how things used to be brought a smile to my lips. Things used to be so simple

Back when we were just friends

Back when the brothers were still in the band

Back when I didn't care that she wasn't mine

Back when we weren't so broken

Back when I wasn't constantly looking other my shoulder in fear

It was hard to understand what changed it. Why couldn't things ever stay simple? Why didn't you know just what you had until it slipped from your grasp?

I never fully appreciated the nights the five of us spent in the tour bus, sipping hot chocolates and watching gory horrors, Josh with Hayley in his lap cuddled up in an armchair. Back in the days when I didn't used to get jealous when I saw Hayley with someone who wasn't me,

I smile again at the thought just as the nurse applies the finishing touches to my cuts.

" there your All done now. You just need to go to the front desk to sign some papers and then you can go" she says kindly and I meekly thanked her before signing the papers with a flourish, just wanting to go home.

I met Jeremy at the door but Hayley wasn't there. Jeremy quickly picked up that I wondered why she was missing and quickly explained she had to meet an old friend in town. That was odd, she promised she would wait for me just minutes ago but I decide not to question it.

An hour later
  We sat on opposite ends of the couch, sipping tea and joking around. We had got back from the hospital relatively quickly without being stuck in traffic and Jeremy insisted I rest. He really cared and it meant a lot. Jeremy was like an older brother To me. I was only young on our first tour and he immediately made me feel like I could go to him about anything, even though I wasn't an official member of the band. He accepted me, no questions asked, into his loving arms and supported me from day one. Over the years we grew closer and closer and never once have I doubted the bond of our friendship.

Something about Jeremy calms me down, the way he always could find a silver lining to every problem, to every cloud. Most people thought I only worried about Hayley but I did worry about Jeremy too but right now Hayley took priority. It wasn't Fair but neither was life and that's the way it had to be. Jeremy accepted that but I still felt bad for how much I had neglected him lately.

It was nice to have some time just me and him and I tried to turn most of the conversation to him. Lately, he had been the one hearing all my problems, now it was my turn to listen to his.

We were in the middle of our chat when in walked Hayley. We couldn't see her but we could hear her loud distinctive laugh echoed off the walls. We could also hear that she wasn't alone, somebody else's voice mixed in the air with her own.

She walked in and behind her was the phantom from my nightmare

" what is he doing here?" I thundered, looking him up and down in disgust. I looked at their hands, their fingers tightly interlocked together, his filling the empty space where another mans should be. Mine

" he's my boyfriend" Hayley announced and as if to illustrate her point further, leaned up and plants a kiss on his cheek, while Ashley grinned like a cat.