Chapter 17. 2013- Baltimore.

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After the whole mess of my failed wedding ceremony, I reconnected with Will. He was right, I never gave him a chance. I should have give him that chance years ago because I'm a very happy man now. He retired from his political career and finally came out publicly. He was happier than he ever could. His son finally forgive him when he knew about the real story. On the other side, Paul despised me because I left him. Nat moved to Baltimore with me and we sold our house in Boston. I told Will I want to take it slow so we still live in a separate place. Nat kept teasing me about how I looked like a teenager nowadays.
I fell in love with Will more than twenty years ago and he was the only person that I could dream of when I was locked up and tortured for three years. Most of my relationship with him was on my mind. Now we are doing it for real and Will never failed to take care of me. He was a loving man and it's kind of heartbreaking whe he told me that he never wants anyone else but me. I knew I kept going back to him because I felt like he was my friend and I never knew that Will were so upset everytime I left him.
But I had been so scared to actually date him. What if my fantasies with Will was just a fantasy? What if we broke up? He's the only one that can comfort me, I don't want to lose him. What if Will realize that he's not actually gay? I'm just scared of the what if that I never took a consideration of how Will actually feels about me. He told me that he's demisexual, and he never fell in love with anyone else after me. To hear that he was unhappy the whole time we were apart just made me felt guilty. He told me that I shouldn't feel guilty because it was his mistakes. He said that he could have chase me and gave up everything just to be with him but he didn't do that. He knew no one will be happy with him announcing to the world that he fell in love with his subordinate during war. He tried to suppress his love for me and that's what put us in this situation. I think I'm tired of dodging the inevitable which is to actually try it out with Will. I need to give him that chance and he didn't disappoint me. He was such a nice man and the only regret I had was I should have done this a lot earlier.
I kissed Will's neck as the sun peeking from the crack of the curtain. I nudged him because I knew he was just pretending to sleep. His hand were groping my balls to tease me under the blanket. I told him that he's being a teenager. I pushed him away after that and stood up. Not that I wanted to leave him, but I need to take my pills.
"What are you taking?" Will slipped out of bed too.
"Pills to manage my HIV" I just realized that I never told him about my HIV.
"Oh.." He moved away for a little.
"I drink this so you won't catch it. Do you want me to do a test?" I confronted him.
"No.. I'm just a little taken aback with that. Are you.." He bites his lower lip and tried to find the best words.
"I got it from Ned and been taking medicines since then. So you are safe."
"No.. that's not what I meant. Are you feeling okay?"
"You mean I'm not dying or something? No, I'm fine." I chuckled. He smacked my butt.
"That's not funny!" He pouted.
"Will, I'm fine. I promise you. I'm here to stay." I kissed his lips.
"I have waited for a long time to be with you and I want to spend the rest of my life with you." He sighed.
I shook my head. "Can we just take it slow?"
Will turned away. "Fine.. I need to get some fresh air."
"Will, what happened?" I pulled him.
"I'm just upset with the possibility that I might lose you again. Okay?" Will suddenly snapped.
I let him go and he went out for a walk. I understand I hurt him a lot but I never saw him being this vulnerable. But I want to enjoy my time with Will. We are no longer on the warzone. I just want to be happy without the fear of losing our life. Will still rubbed my scars and said he was sorry for that. I felt like one of the most horrible part of getting back with Will was it reminded me of the war since he kept bringing that up, but I still feel like it's worth it. I packed my stuff and leave Will's house because that's what I do everytime I stayed at his place.
I got a call from Will when I was heading to the office. I picked it up and he was full on crying and pleading for me to stay with him. I felt stupid. I just made my boyfriend thought that I left him again. It took me a few minutes to calmed him down. I forgot all the trauma that I gave Will when I cut ties to him multiple times. I promise him that I would make it up to him this weekend. So that day I didn't even work much because I am busy booking last minute trip for me and Will.
I felt like Will deserve a big huge appreciation weekend getaways since he had been such a great boyfriend for me. The way he pampered me everyday with love is just amazing. I couldn't ask for a better boyfriend than Will. I just want him to feel special too.
But then our fate told us a different story. That night, I was about to walked out from the office and suddenly all my world went dark. I lose my consciousness.

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