"Done. We happen to be in the right place—care to swap right in the here and now?" I ask, jokingly, smirking as a nude bather passes nearby. I turn to Edmund, but I'm surprised and saddened to witness a glum expression paint itself across his otherwise perfect features. "I was joking, you know. I have no interest in stripping, even if it meant that you'd have to join me."
"I realized that it was in jest, it's just that..." His voice trails off as his glumness only seems to worsen.
"Are you all right?" I ask, genuinely worrying about him, but he turns away, facing the ocean that will soon separate us. Now, I find myself sharing his mood, although for very different reasons, I'm sure. "What's wrong?"
"I didn't just find out about this place today."
"What do you mean? What does that have to do with the sad look spoiling your perfect, beautiful face?" I ask, attempting to cheer him up even in the slightest with a bit of blatant flattery—although, it's not as if he doesn't deserve it, it is true, he is devilishly good looking. He turns to face me, paying me a weak smile at the corner of his lips. I throw an arm around his shoulders, but he quickly catches my arm and lowers it, returning it back to my side. A shooting pain rips into my chest, empty and hollow, the rejection of my comforting gesture tears deeply into my heart as Edmund looks around as if to see if someone might be watching us.
"I'm sorry. I had to do that," he says, his gaze returning to me.
"Why?" I ask, the hurt in my voice sounding obvious to my own ears.
"If a fan were to see—it wouldn't... I'm sorry. I just can't do anything anymore, not in public, not with how well known I am now. That's what's been bothering me—about this place. I didn't just happen upon it today—it was always on my old, bucket list. So was..." His voice trails off as a small group of beach-goers passes near us. In our silence, I come to fully realize why he'd rejected my arm. He doesn't want to deal with any potential harassment and I can't blame him for that, because I don't think that I would either, if I were as well known as he is.
"What? 'So was' what?" I ask, urging him to continue as the last person leaves.
"I remembered what it is that I wrote specifically." He looks around, perhaps to see if anyone else is close enough to hear us, but nobody seems close enough to be within earshot. He returns his attention to me, in a hushed voice, he adds, "I wrote, 'bathe in the nude, near the Golden Gate Bridge'. One of a great many things I can no longer do for fear of repercussions."
"Well, I know what that's like—having to protect my image, my reputation, my popularity—so I can hardly blame you. Nor could I really be mad at you for rejecting my gesture."
"Right. You're situation was similar in many ways. Still, I'm sorry for pushing your arm away."
"No, you're all right. I understand. Forget about it. I shouldn't have been so careless and thoughtless about your needs and your situation. I should've known better—fame and all. So, I'm the one who needs to apologize, not you. I'm sorry."
"Fame..." His voice trails off as he sighs. "I don't consider myself to be 'famous', it's not at all a word that I would choose to bestow upon myself."
"Well, you're certainly not not famous," I say, chuckling, hoping to raise his spirits if even in the slightest, but, once again, he doesn't take.
"This life—my life—is so much different now. I'm not ungrateful, but I'm certainly not going to pretend that it's all perfect. I'm grateful for everyone of my fans. I'm grateful for everything they've given me and the opportunities they've opened up for me. And, I'm extremely grateful for their love and their support, but sometimes I feel like my entire world revolves around them as if I have nothing else, no other reason to exist, and I feel so empty, so ironically alone despite it all. That's what drove me to meet Jordan—besides his talent—I was hoping to find a meaningful friendship with someone who has yet to be tainted by the world of social media fame. Perhaps, I found what I was truly looking for," he says, finally smiling again as he gazes deeply into my eyes. "With you, that is."
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Teen FictionFrom the outside, Dalton's life seems rather idyllic, until a middle-of-the-night phone call changes his life forever. What will Dalton do when he realizes he's been living a lie? Can he find peace within himself? - - - Note: I'm primarily a gay-the...
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