Warning: Lots and lots of swearing ahead and you probably shouldn't even read this XD
Okay so FUCK LIZARDS AND COCKROACHES UGH TODAY WAS THE WORST
So like the morning and early afternoon was pretty normal; eating cereal without milk for breakfast, Mum broke the door down.
And we went to the hardware store and stuff.
We came back from the store and I went to the bathroom to ya know, do my business.
And then my dad was calling for me to hurry up bc he wanted to go too.
So I unlocked the door and all of a sudden
A FUCKING LIZARD FLIES OFF OF THE DOOR OUT OF NOWHERE
LIKE FUCKING SUPERMAN WITH ITS ARMS AND LEGS SPREAD OUT AND SHIT
Like fuck.
Fuck.
Stupid lizards.
But the enCOUNTER WITH THE COCKROACH WAS EVEN WORSE LIKE FUCKITY FUCK
So like when everything happened I was talking with Louese (Yay another dialogue):
*talking about lizard encounter*
L: IVE SEEN THAT HAPPEN OMG ITS SO GROSS SHIT
Me: idek where the fuck it went
*cockroach appears when I'm INSIDE THE SHOWER*
Me: Crap fuCKING COCKROACH FUCKING SHIT FUCKING DHIT DHIELD NA FUCK IC AJIWPDOXZHJMAE
L: EW IS IT BIG
Me: I CLOSED THE DOOR AND ITS LOCKED INSIDE WITH ME AHEJODOXJSHA
L: Why does your bathroom sound like mine. Flying lizards, cockroach XD
Me: FUCKING SHIT FUCK HELL FUUUUUUUCK
L: GET OUT SHIT
L: RUN
Me: IM NAKED GODDAMMIT FUCKING FUCK IT WENT ON A TOWEL AND ITS JUST STAYING THERE
Me: okay hERES WHAT IM GONNA DO
L: SHIT EW
L: I swear that's like my bathroom. A lizard fell out from my towel XD
Me: IM gONNA HTOWS THE TOWEL OUT THE SHOWER
Me: WITH TE WINDOW WIPER
Me: This is EITHER BRILLIANCE OR MADNESS
L:HAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
Me: FUCK FUCK DUCK I HEARD IT MOVE
Me: OKAY PLAN B IM USING THE SHOWER IF IT COMES OUT
Me: IM GONNA SPRAY THAT FUCKER WITH WATER
L: YEEEESSSS
L: You'd be screwed tho if that lizard can swim
Me: ITS A COCKROACH
L: Oh XD KILL IT
Me: FUCK IT IM HITTING THAT BITCH NOBODY SCREWS MY SHOWER TIME
L:HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
Me: I SEE IT THAT LITTLE FUCKER BE HIDING
Me: IM NOT EVEN TAKING A SHOWER ANYMORE
L: YOURE LOOKING AROUND ARENT YOU
Me: WHERE THE FUCK
Me: OKAU IM GONNA THROW THE TOWEL
*puts down phone and hits the towel 99999 times and the damn thing wont come out*
Me: IM GONNA RUN FOR IT
Me: FUCK SHOWERS IDC
*puts on another towel on myself*
Me: 3
Me: 2
Me: 1
*flees*
*survives*
Me: YEAHHHHHH FUCK WOOOO
So basically I did NOT take a shower and I'm crying bc ITS SO HOT AND MY SKIN FEELS STICKY AND SHIT
FUCKING COCKROACH I HOPE YOU DIE AND VAI ALL'INFERNO
*angrily cries for the whole night*
