Blondes and Bluenettes (Lukadrien and EmiNath) • Miraculous

Chapter 21 | night fall

The bedside table had a lamp, bottle of water, phone charger and headphones. And a book, with a bookmark sticking out the top telling Luka Adrien was still reading it. He picked it up to see which one it was, the cover being plain and branded with a publishing company that was known for printing the classics.

Lolita.

Ah, that controversial book everyone always talked about. The one that had two movies that completely missed the point. The bookmark was almost at the end, meaning Adrien had read almost the whole thing by now and would probably be able to finish it in an hour or so.

"Better not loose my bookmark"

Luka almost jumped hearing Adrien's voice behind him. He'd been so distracted looking around, he hadn't even noticed Adrien was back.

"Don't worry, I haven't even opened it. Just seeing which one it was" Luka replied.

"I see why people talk about it, it definitely lives up to its reputation" Adrien said, sitting in the bed next to Luka, this time in his pyjamas.

"It's good?"

"Yes, but very twisted. It's like a train wreck, it's so tragic but you just can't look away. I figured I'd read it to see what all the fuss was about, I totally get it"

Lolita, the classic novel by Vladimir Nabokov caused controversy when it first came out. And to this day it was a controversial book. Why? Because it explored the horrendous abuse of a 13 year old girl at the hands of her step father. It was known for being disturbing, get written so eloquently you couldn't look away. Told from the point of view of the abuser, it was a look into phenomena the unreliable narrator. The abuser, Humbert, was so delusional he genuinely thought his feelings were justified despite knowing they were wrong. He downplays what he's done to Lo, and through the cracks in his story you can see how Lo is actually suffering.

It was hard to read for some people, because of how horrible the actions were. But it was a conversation that needed to be had about how abusers twist the story and downplay the suffering of the victim because of their own delusions.

"I've heard a lot about this novel, is it really that hard to read?" Luka asked.

"It'd definitely be hard for people in Lo's position. I'll admit there were some parts I had to put the book down and walk away because it was written in such gross detail. But I needed to know how it ends, and if things turned out ok. Spoiler: it doesn't. But it's still a conversation that had to started back when it was published" Adrien replied.

Luka put the book back on the bedside table, now curious about potentially reading it himself.

"Sounds both interesting and horrific at the same time" Luka said.

"That's what drew me in. I've been trying to read more since I have slightly more time now father is distracted with whatever he does in his office. And honestly... I think I wanted to read it to see what it was like from an abusers point of view. Just how detached from reality they are, how they make massive leaps to try and justify their actions. I thought maybe, even if I'm not in the same position as Lo, I could use it to understand why my dad thinks he's in the right about all he does..." Adrien admitted.

Luka was silent for a moment, understanding where Adrien was coming from but finding it tragic nonetheless. It's not easy realising your parent is abusive, and naturally you'd want to try and understand it. Even if Lo and Adrien didn't suffer the same type of abuse (thank god), they were both teenagers with horrible father figures just trying to understand what was going on in the heads of such horrible people.

Adrien viewed his father as an unreliable narrator, all his words were either fake or twisted versions of the truth. Just like the abuser in the book. In a way, he found himself understanding the mind of an abuser a little better thanks to lolita and books similar to it.

It's about power, control, a fantasy and being so detached from reality you can't tell right from wrong.

As sad as it was for Luka to find out his beloved felt like he could relate to the victim in a book about abuse, he knew it was a coping mechanism. A way of understanding what was going on.

"You know, a lot of people who've read lolita also like the virgin suicides. There's similar themes of parental control, maybe you should read that too" Luka suggested.

"I've heard of that, I've been meaning to read it. I think I'll read it next" Adrien replied.

Luka wanted to talk with Adrien a little more about how he could help with the situation he was in, but he needed to get all this makeup off first.

"Tell you what, I'll take the worlds quickest shower and then we can talk some more. The makeup is starting to melt off my face" Luka said, getting up and grabbing the towel Adrien had gotten for him.

"Sounds good. I like talking to you" Adrien smiled.

"I like talking to you too. And we both know late nights are the best time for deep talks"