A Diamond Heart

Episode 50

"Calm down girlfriend, just calm down and talk to me. What happened between you two? Why would Fernando divorce you just two days after your wedding?"

"It's all my fault he hates me now. I betrayed his trust".

"Betrayed his trust? That's not possible, you are too honest to even betray anyone let alone the man you love so dearly".

"I'm not who you think I am, I'm a bad person, Sabri. I'm the worst human being that has ever lived. I'm a damn bitch, I'm a liar, a pretender, and a rapist!" I wailed and Sabrina stared at me in alter despair.

"What was that? What are you saying? You are confusing me right now, I need to call Kim maybe she'll understand you better than I do" she shook her head and grabs her phone from the table to dial Kim's line.

Just then her doorbell rang and she squint at me. "I'll be right back".

"Hey, girlfriend, what's up?" Kim shrieks from the doorstep and Sabrina drags her in without saying a word. "Hey be careful, you know I'm too fragile!" Kim whines.

"Shut up and take a sit. You came right on time, I was about to call when...."

"Micaela!" Kim squeals excitedly interrupting Sabrina mid-sentence, and she came crushing me with a hug. "Wow! I wasn't expecting to see you here, when did you get back from your honeymoon, girlfriend? Gosh! Your wedding was lit! You've got to see all the beautiful pictures we took and...."

"Quit the drama already! Can't you see she's not happy right now?" Sabrina intruded.

It was only then Kim had a closer look at my face and she saw the swollen eyes and tears streaming down my cheeks. "Oh no, what happened to you? Why are you so sad?" She reached for my cheeks and her thumb wipes off the tears, but that didn't stop them from spilling out more.

"I fucked up, girls. I didn't just fuck up but I fucked my life up. I told Fernando a secret that I've been hiding for the past thirteen years, and that secret is the reason behind my sadness".

Silence fell in the room for a moment and I could tell my friends were sharing confused glances at each other.

Sabrina took my right hand and held it, "I don't know serious the situation is but please tell us already, we are here to listen to you. We are not going to judge you, everyone has a bad past that we find hard to forget but that does not mean we'll drown in our past and not live in the future that is here with us. No matter what, we'll always be here for you as your friends and sisters you've got" Sabrina said.

Kim took my left hand, "Sabrina is right, we will always be here for you in good or bad times. You don't know if we'll have a solution to whatever might have transpired between you and your husband. Just trust us and share it with us".

Sunk into a gloomy reverie, I resolved to tell them all that happened. "You guys have no idea that I've tried committing suicide a few times before I met Fernando..."

"What!" Both girls exclaimed cutting me off and they flinched from me.

"It's because I was frustrated and guilty over the damage I caused in Fernando's life thirteen years ago. I was forced to rape him on his 15th birthday and he never knew who raped him until a few days ago when I confessed to him".

"What!" They both exclaimed again with wide eyes and shared glances at each other. "How...how did it happen?" Kim asked.

"It's quite a long story but I'm going to tell you two all about it. You are free to lash out on me when I'm done, I do deserve it" I let out a sigh and glance at them.

They nod for me to continue. Who knows perhaps after they hear my story they are going to also flee from me like I've got a plague, then once again I'll be left all alone like back in old days. What a pathetic life I've lived!