The Obscure Downsides of Fame

27 || we're getting pizza

Why aren't I?

I closed my eyes and took a deep breath in, only slowly releasing it after holding it in for a few seconds.

I got dressed as quickly as I could and lied down in bed only a second later, not wasting any more of either my time or my sanity in the mirror. I decided I needed a good night's rest before the show tomorrow, both physically and mentally. So I closed my eyes and let myself fall into a deep slumber.

***

Danny woke me up by banging on the door, asking me whether I would be performing today. I didn't say anything. Again. Like every single day this past week. I'd somehow regained the energy to take a shower last night, and even attempted washing my hair, but somehow there was nothing that could get me out of there anymore.

"Oakley," he said. Only a few seconds later the door to the room opened.

"How did you even get in?" I asked. I turned my back toward him and kept my eyes closed. A sharp pain emerged right above my eye, underneath my eyebrow, the moment he talked.

"They gave me the keys. I told them there was a mix-up and we were supposed to share the room," he said. The curtains were still closed when he came in, but now light entered the room, worsening the headache that had already started settling in. I covered myself in the blankets, trying to block some of the sunlight out.

"Are you good?"

I was silent, because I knew even just a single word would make it worse.

Danny sat down on the bed, right next to where I was curled up in a ball.

"I'm canceling the tour," he said.

"Yeah?" I asked, my voice hoarse from the long night's sleep. After my talk with Nolan yesterday, I really thought I could finish this week off neatly. I would cancel all of it. I really would, but I wanted to give everyone a fair chance to prepare.

"Yeah," he said.

"No, I'm fine," I said, pushing the blankets off my face. "I can go today. Just let me sleep in for a little longer."

"No," he said. "It's 2 PM. You've had enough sleep."

"I barely closed an eye last night," I lied. I couldn't let people cross state borders only for me to cancel the same day. I couldn't leave my crew abruptly unemployed for an indefinite amount of time. This wasn't just about me.

"Bullshit. I checked in on you yesterday at 11 and you slept as a baby. You're not performing today. Not this month. Maybe not even this year."

"People depend on me," I said, dragging myself from the bed, but Danny held onto my arm.

"No," he said. "We can fix it. Your mom can help with the legal shit and I'll take care of the announcement and all that. Don't worry about it."

"No," I said. "You don't get it, I can't—"

"Yes, you can. Just shut the fuck up for once, Oakley. Let me help you."

"I'm not some weak kid who needs things handed to him on a silver platter, Danny. I can handle this. It's one of the easiest jobs out there. If I can't even do this, then..."