Shut Up and Review

#4. Graveyard or Lullabies

"Graveyard of Lullabies" by Jordynsaelor follows a yet to be named death mage who struggles to reconcile with her past. Her only company is Skeleton Cook and a jangling skeleton cat. We get to see glimpses of the character's past through disjointed glimpses of her memory.

The cover is beautiful with an appealing colour pallet. I like the way the dark blue lines of the skull match the background. The blurb starts with alliteration right off the bat, which is something I'm a huge fan of. The premise of the story comes across clearly and I liked the way it was conveyed the protagonist is trans through the use of pronouns and reference to the "boy" she used to be, rather than outright state that she is trans.

This story exemplifies what it means to 'show' rather than 'tell.' The readers are told almost nothing, and shown everything. My impatience got the best of me on some occasions as I was longing for clarity on some matters, however I think the lack of clarity may be a worthy exchange as it suits the style and the tone and I'm left to trust the author that all will be revealed in due time. The world building is accomplished entirely through what the MC reveals to us through her narration and memories and we see the world through her eyes. This causes many questions to arise, as what is common knowledge to the MC (like why a fungus bleeds) is not common knowledge to us. This build up of questions could have easily become frustrating, however they were worked into the story so effectively they served to build to the tension, and convey the overarching tone of longing. We get just enough pay off to some of these initial questions that adequate trust is built between the author and reader that we will learn everything in due time.

A great instance of this is how we learn of the MC's mentor Kolariq. We see him within her memories, or in phrases when she is reminded of him. We are shown enough of him to know he is her mentor without being explicitly told. Through these memories of Kolariq we get to see the MC learn how to work with death magic, so we learn as she does. At the same time we are slowly walked through events of her past that have led up to her current state of isolation. We are yet again fed just enough information to keep us coming back for more.

The narration is done through first person perspective in the present tense. This gives a sense of intimacy with the character, as well as urgency. The MC has a clear and unique voice throughout the narrative and I enjoyed the addition of quirks such as counting steps from point A to point B, and pointing out specific measurements. I think this tied in nicely with the mention that the MC had learned math like they learned a fourth language. The MC's isolation and need for companionship is shown through her relationship with Skeleton Cook as well as the skeleton sea cat. In her interactions with these characters is also an underlying sense of guilt and distance, as it is implied she has caused them to become dead and reanimated. There is a heartbreaking scene where the MC puts a rug over the sea cat to pretend to pet her.

The way the MC approaches parts of herself as though they are separate from her being is quite well done and interesting. She addresses her Brain and Heart as individual entities and in these glimpses there is a switch to the second person point of view. This approach is rather uncommon, but it was put to effective use here. As we follow the MC through her memories, she addresses her Brain and Heart in this manner as a way to relive these moments while also creating distance between herself and the memories. This adds further to the sensation of being disjointed from ones own being, as if she exists in layers as well as in pieces. The most telling passage thus far is, "And I rub the pink soap everywhere, with my eyes shut, pretend my hands are just holding somebody's corpse, because that makes it easier" which shows us how uncomfortable she is with engaging with her physical form.

Throughout the narrative we glean that she is trans based on how she remembers herself in the past, and thinks of herself in the present. When she leaves her home to visit the Summer merchants in town, there are a few moments that convey the need to pass. Not only is she hiding the fact she is a death mage from them, but it is apparent that the main religion fosters homophobia and I'd assume transphobia as well, so it could be incredibly dangerous for her if they find out she's trans. I find this is perfectly conveyed when she comforts herself with the power of "knowing" in reference to her death mage abilities. This scene has a triple purpose. We see more world building as the MC mentally describes some of her capabilities. On the surface, she is thinking about how she might have a "mob at [her] throat" if they were to know about her death mage abilites, but underneath that, we know they would unfortunately attack her similarly if they found out she is trans.

I loved the writing style overall. There were numerous instances where it read like poetry in prose format. In chapter two, there is a scene where the MC remembers 'Him,' who we later learn is named Tulimaq. In this scene, the MC recalls her memories of Tulimaq by addressing Brain and we read of her love that for a reason unknown to us at this time, couldn't be. Honestly, this whole passage brought tears to my eyes.

There were many lovely turns of phrases such as, 'you were the liquid to his drowning,' and a description of blood as a 'silent liquid' that were so striking. They added to the tone of longing, and regret of the narrative so wonderfully. The use of repetition was well done also. We get a lot of continuous references to blood and bone throughout as well as images of ice and glass which contrast well against eachother. There is also an underlying theme of things not always being as they appear to be, or as they're supposed to be. We have rocks that are actually a type of fungus, a fridge that is not a fridge and clothes that she wears, that are not really her clothes.

"Graveyard of Lullabies" is a heart wrenching and moving read with beautifully written turns of phrase that allows us to see through the MC's eyes as she tries to heal from her past. If you like stories of longing, regret and hope told through poetic imagery and turns of phrase, this is the book for you.