His Ex

Part Six

I shoot up in bed as a thin layer of cold sweat covered my body, soaking through my shirt.

The wind was blowing and the lights flickered. I pulled the blanket up over my head as a mental pain shot through my body, causing me to flinch.

It wasn't real. It's all mental. An illusion. But why did it feel so real? I took deep breaths as tears crossed over the bridge of my nose and slipped down towards my ear before dropping onto the sheets.

I curled up even tighter and willed myself to sleep once more. I didn't want to remember anything. I didn't want to think about the past. I didn't want to worry about the future. I just wanted to forget and feel something other than pain, anxiety, paranoia, and fear.

I felt myself begin to drift off again. As the darkness filled my consciousness, my breathing steadied and tears slowed.

_______________

I woke to a knocking and the gentle voice of a woman. "-can't leave him alone all the time. Besides, you don't have to go to work until 6 anyway."

Just how thin are these walls?

"I know sis, but we can't keep visiting him like we've known him for years." A male replies.

"But we can offer him as much comfort as possible for now. Either way, I know you were just as worried about him as I was when you watched him get driven to the hospital." She says before they knock again.

I get up and slowly unlock the door. I am greeted with the smiling face of Gin and upturned lips of Ryunosuke.

"H-hi." I stutter as the door opens even more.

"Good morning Atsushi!" She exclaims with controlled excitement. "How did you sleep?"

"Okay?" I reply more questioning than stating.

"Oh." Her smile falters a bit before she continues. "So, we brought you some breakfast. Do you like doughnuts?"

I nod slowly before allowing them to enter the small room.

They take a seat on the couch as I position myself on the bed with my hands in my lap. I begin to relax again but flinch and close my legs as the pulling of stitches and skin shoot a brief pain through my lower regions.

A concerned look flashed through their eyes before it disappeared. I felt awkward. Their pity filled looks were uncomfortable and I hated it. I didn't want to get pitied. It made me feel worse than I already felt.

"U-um, excuse me for a moment." I bow my head slightly before making my way to the bathroom.

Once inside, I lock the door and lean uo against it. I take a deep breath and release it slowly, my hands shaking a little as I ran them through my hair.

I could hear their murmuring through the door although I couldn't make out any words.

A door closed and silence followed. Moving to the sink, I turned on the faucet and splashed some water on my face.

As droplets dropped from my chin, I looked into the mirror, the sight bringing tears to my eyes.

My eyes are bloodshot and blotchy from last night, and my hair is disheveled. My skin practically clung to my bones because of malnutrition and took on a pale, almost grey color. My once brilliantly colored eyes are now dull and dark. I look away as a tear joins the water on my face.

I turn off the tap and turn around, resulting in a flinch and cry in pain. I kneel down to the ground, settling on my knees as my hands cupped around nothing.