No Kissing Allowed

Chapter 36: Back to Reality

Jamie.

That was one of those expressions he liked to use. She could hear the echo of it now, delivered in the playful tone he adopted for their games. "I'd test the temperature before jumping in the pool, if you know what I mean." He'd said it the first night she'd spent in his room—the night she couldn't sleep, and he found her talking to herself in the bathroom mirror. Cora felt a little dizzy at the memory.

The tea was cool enough by now. She took a long gulp, coughing as the whiskey burned down the length of her throat.

Cora remembered all of Jamie's favorite lines. She should. She'd reviewed the tape. She'd already watched back most of the clips floating around YouTube. She'd stayed up late last night, watching video after video. She needed to know exactly how much of herself she'd unwittingly exposed.

And of course, Cora couldn't possibly watch those scenes with her friends around, no matter how close they might be. It only reinforced the fact that people she knew—people she had to interact with every day—had been made privy to all her deepest secrets.

Like the fact that she detested kissing, at least 99% of the time... the fact that she had fallen out of love with Steven and into the dreaded ick.... or the fact that her thoughtless actions had led directly to his death.

Now everyone knew. Her friends. Her work colleagues. Strangers on the street, pointing at her and whispering. They all saw her now. The real her, exposed from behind the mask she'd always kept carefully in place.

Cora took another long pull of her spiked tea.

There was another reason she'd stayed up all night after she left the reunion taping yesterday. She couldn't sleep in any case. And she had to examine the evidence. She had to search for clues, one way or the other, to answer the question screaming in her mind:

Did Jamie know about the hidden cameras in the bungalow? Or had they both been in the dark?

She still couldn't say for sure, and the thought made her stomach twist. She didn't want to believe him capable of such a betrayal. She thought she knew him.

But did she?

A few more sips down the hatch, and she began to feel the whiskey's effects. Probably not the best decision to drink after a string of sleepless nights, tossing and turning in her empty bed, but she needed something to calm her nerves.

"OK, I'm ready."

"Are you sure?" Penny asked.

Cora nodded firmly. "Fast-forward to the part after I walked out. I need to see what else he said." That was the only piece of the story she hadn't witnessed in-person or watched play back on tape. The final puzzle piece. Maybe it would give her some answers.

Lauren knelt before the laptop to advance the video. The clips from the reunion show whizzed by, and Cora drained her cup down to the bitter dregs.

Penny eyed her, and Cora could sense her friend's concern. It was funny how Penny had morphed over the years into the mother hen of their friend group. It hadn't always been that way. Once upon a time, Penny had been the one with her life falling down around her ears, back before she got together with David and finally headed to med school.

"Cora," Penny murmured in her ear, low enough not to be overheard by Lauren. "You know I can give you a referral, right? If you need to see someone."