𝗧𝗢𝗢 𝗬𝗢𝗨𝗡𝗚 【 𝗵𝗲𝗲𝗷𝗮𝘆 】

chapter nine

jay grabbed his head and looked down "it hurts so much" he mumbled "i'm going to end like this, right?" he put his hands next to his hips and looked at the sky again "it'll hurt till the end. i will suffer until i know how to breathe."

he laughed at his own words. he told himself he will not care, but he guesses it will be better to just die.

but when he dies, what about his mum? he was afraid of it the most, that's why he tried to not think about it. ever since jay's dad died, his mum has been working her ass off to give a decent life for her kids. and even with all those hardships she gave so much love to jay and eunseong.

"isn't it cold?" jay trembled, surprised. he turned around and it was none other than heeseung. for some reason, they always ended up in one place together.

heeseung quickly sat next to jay without saying anything else. he just stared at the sky. jay figured that he might want to be alone, so he stood up, ready to leave.

"where are you going?" heeseung touched his hand to stop him. jay flustered took his hand away.

"i thought you might want to be alone" he said. heeseung looked at him confused "i mean, people usually go here to clear their mind and feel lonely so i thought you were one of these people."

"it's okay. let's be lonely together, then."

jay nodded and sat next to heeseung. they both didn't say a word. the tall boy seemed like he was enjoying fresh air and the view of the setting sunset, and jay was just looking at the sky and sometimes shyly peeking at heeseung.

"there's something i've been curious about" heeseung said, breaking the long silence.

"what is it?" jay quickly turned to face heeseung. he's actually been waiting for him to say something.

"it's hard to ask" he also turned his whole body to face jay.

"you can say it, don't worry about anything."

heeseung nodded, looking down "can i really ask about it?"

jay was confused, but he didn't want to question heeseung. it must be something important since it's so hard for him to say.

"ever since i met you your condition was... weird?" heeseung finally said.

jay smiled, trying to act stupid "what do you mean?"

"you've been eating less, seemed pale most of the time and even the second time i saw you you were on the ground because you fainted. i was wondering if you're perhaps sick."

no way. does he know? jay panicked. was he that easy to read? he was sure he made a good job hiding all of this, but heeseung for some reason noticed all of this. what is he supposed to do? tell him the truth?

"it's nothing important" jay said quickly, afraid that the tall boy might say something else and doubt him "i just happen to be this kind of person, i don't eat a lot, that's why things like that happen. my friends and family are used to it."

he tried to laugh it off, but heeseung kept a serious expression on his face. it almost seemed like he was trying to make jay nervous on purpose.

"i don't think you should overreact" jay patted his shoulder "just get used to it and don't worry-"

"i overheard" heeseung said.

"what?"

jay's eyes widened. what was he even talking about?

"i overheard your talk with eunseong the other night."

no way.

"i don't think i understand" jay smiled. he was nervous, so his smile was clearly fake.