Do You Trust Me? // Bucky Barnes

36

Ava

She had left Bucky to his research, drowning in files and papers and a mood so dark it seemed to have summoned the thick layer of grey that swirled over head now. She ran with no direction or thought. She simply let her feet hit the sidewalk in a rhythm that drowned all whispered secrets and wailing truths, and she let her mind empty with each burning inhale. She pushed forward at a pace that tore at her lungs and clawed against her limbs, and yet she still ran. While Bucky tried to find him. While Bucky tried to find her hope.

Sam had left the safe house two days ago - just twenty-four hours after Bucky's release - and returned to the one place Ava wanted to be right now. He'd slipped away in the early hours of the morning with the promise that he'd be back, and he'd gone to seek help. Steve had called that night. Sam was with them and he'd be bringing their stuff to them when he returned. Jamie had bought Ava some new things while she was away. Nathaniel had made her something. They all missed her. They all missed Buck. They wanted them to get the job done and get home safe. Home. Ava wanted to go home now.

As another wave of agonising guilt seemed to crawl over her body and pull her into its depths, Ava stumbled, and when she fell, in the silent streets of the little suburb she did not feel at home in, she lay still for a moment. She let the world pass around her. And then her phone rang.

***

"Hey, Little Bug," Ava breathed easier when the easy, warm smile of Peter Parker lit up her screen, and she pushed herself to her feet.

"Peter!" A woman's voice called as he opened his mouth to respond, and Ava giggled as Peter's attention snapped to the left and his smile twisted into a disapproving glare. "Is that all your washing or do you want me to throw in your suit too? I'm pretty sure there was a smudge of green goop on your butt in that last news broadcast."

Stepping into the frame, the woman was holding Peter's Spiderman suit in the air, stretching it between her hands and frowning as she inspected the material, and Peter was turning red.

"Well," Ava laughed, throwing herself onto a nearby bench and groaning a little as her muscles protested. "Does your suit need a wash little bug?"

"Don't make me hang up," he grumbled in response, side-eyeing her as he twisted to face the woman in his room. "Aunt May? Seriously? I'm on the phone. What if it was a girl?"

"Is it a girl?" Aunt May's hands flopped down to her sides and her eyes widened as she span to face her nephew, her smile wide in a beautiful and warm face. "Is it MJ?"

"Sorry to disappoint," Ava laughed again, this time letting the feeling warm her chest as Peter groaned and rolled his head back against the back of his seat. "I am a girl, but I'm also far too old and far too taken."

Peter froze before he whispered: "Taken taken?"

"Taken taken," Ava responded.

"So, it's serious with you two?"

She laughed as he practically bounced in his seat.

"I told him I love him, so yeah, I'd say it's pretty serious." And then she sighed. "I miss you, kid."

She watched as the woman behind Peter smiled sadly and side stepped out of the room, and suddenly Ava felt deflated and broken. She had seen the love and excitement at the idea of Peter's dating life taking a jump. She had seen the teasing and the laughter behind the washing question. She had seen family and she missed her brother. She missed Teddy so much it felt as if a part of her had fallen into a deep abyss that would not allow her the freedom of finding it. She felt incomplete. She felt so alone it might burn her where she sat.

"Yeah?" Peter's smile grew and Ava mirrored it the best she could. "I miss you, too. Like, I really miss you. New York is great, you know, but I liked helping you and hanging out. You're like... You're like a sister to me or something." He blushed when he finished talking and Ava's breath felt sharper and more damaging with his confession. "I'm sorry." He ran a hand through his hair as he closed his eyes and huffed and Ava shook her head.

"It's okay, Peter. I get it... You're like family to me too."

His smile was creeping back now, but his eyes opened and he looked defeated. He looked as she felt.

"Sam told me," he admitted, "and I want you to know that I'm here, Ava. I'll listen if you need to cry and scream and shout, or I'll curse the world with you if you need your anger to be matched. Or I can help, you know, with the search? I mean, I don't have the same technical ability Tony had, but he taught me a little, you know? And I have EDITH. And don't laugh, but she's pretty cool you know. Smartest computer I have ever encountered. She figured me out in like no time and I think she could -"

"I've got to go." Ava was running before she finished talking and she wanted to run through the phone and hug Peter Parker like her life depended on it. She wanted to squeeze him tight and tell him he was a genius. She wanted to tell him... "I love you so much, Little Bug! But I have to go."

She wasn't sure if she'd hung up or not. She just kept running. She ran faster than before and she would not stop running.

***

Peter

All he could see was the blur of picket fences and houses that merged into one. He stared quizzically at the scene from through the phone as her words sank into him and his smile became painful in his face.

"I love you too, Ava." He shook his head as he heard her panting and grunting as she ran back to where he assumed Bucky was hiding out. And then he ended the call.