What We Take Away

Chapter 35 | Cassie

May 5th, 2006

There are only eight days left of classes before my freshman year draws to a close.

All across campus students ignore the coming of final exams, choosing instead to toss frisbees or footballs on the Lawn and enjoy the warmer nights. And tonight, I'm going out to dinner on Church Street.

"You can stop fussing, you look great," Sabrina remarks over her shoulder.

I check my skirt for wrinkles and smooth over my hair for the thousandth time. No matter how I style my wavy locks, I can't seem to get them to obey my wishes. They tumble down to my waist, the warm black contrasting the crisp white and yellow of my smocked, seersucker dress.

"I just don't want any comments about my hair," I complain, shaking out my long waves, which have grown impossibly long over the past nine months. The first thing I'm going do when I'm done with finals is to get a haircut.

"Your mom always comments on your hair," Sabrina laughs, spritzing on a body mist that smells like lavender.

"You're right. I give up," I sigh, dropping my arms to my sides.

My phone clatters on my desk, buzzing with a message. It's a text from Zac.

[Have fun with your fam. Eat some fries for me!]

Smiling, I tap back a response.

[Thanks! I will.]

I whirl around to see Sabrina smacking her lips, which shine a soft, dewy pink. Her freshly-moussed curls bounce around her shoulders, and she looks altogether lovely in a red floral sundress and denim jacket.

"This is silly," I say, giving her a look. "We're way too dressed up. It's just dinner with my family."

"No," she corrects, giving me a small shove towards the door. "It's not just dinner with your family. We're celebrating you tonight!"

"I still don't understand why we need to make a big deal about it," I mumble, stepping out into the hall and heading down the stairs.

"Because, Cassie Yang, you are worth a big deal!" Sabrina grins. "Come on!"

She links her arm into mine once we set foot outside. Our hearts are light and cheery as we walk towards Church Street. Along the way, I notice the lush, new greenery around the Lawn -- pink and purple magnolias, budding dogwoods, and trees finally sprouting canopies of leaves after a long winter.

And what a long winter it was.

I breath deep the clear spring air, feeling a surge of gratitude and amazement. When I set foot onto campus back in August, I did not think my life trajectory would veer. Back then, I was convinced success and happiness came only in very specific containers. But I could not have been more wrong, as this past year has taught me so many more lessons in success and happiness than I could have ever bargained for.

Turns out, some happinesses are won through persistence and believing in yourself.

I suppose I have Aram to thank for grasping this truth. I was already drowning in my own sea of regret before I met him, but it took being with him for me to realize that I didn't want to keep treading water. In a way, his treatment of me gave me the perspective I needed to find my voice and express my needs.

He and I haven't spoken since we broke up, and I'm more than okay with that.

"They're here!" Sabrina exclaims.

I follow the direction of her pointer finger and see three figures in the distance, all with heads of midnight black hair.

My family, I grin.