What We Take Away

Chapter 15 | Cassie

October 21st, 2005

I'm jittery this morning. And though I've already had at least two cups of coffee, I'm certain my agitation has everything to do with the fact the Hahn from Hell is returning our midterms to us this morning than it does the caffeine coursing through my veins.

I glance up at the clock hanging above the door – one minute until class begins. The Hahn from Hell is never late to lecture. Maybe today is not the day after all?

A hand touches my arm.

"I'm sure you did fine," Ranjit says encouragingly. "You studied hard."

I smile weakly. He doesn't need to know that I'd been too distracted by Zac to study the day before the midterm. It's been harder and harder lately to ignore the butterflies in my stomach whenever he's near.

"My apologies—" Dr. Hahn huffs as she rushes through the door, clutching her leather briefcase and jacket. "There was an accident on my commute this morning."

She plunks the briefcase onto the table and drapes her jacket over the chair. Pulling a thick stack of blue books from her case, she clears her throat.

"Let's get this part over with first, shall we?" she fixes us with stone gray eyes that match her silvery hair. "Now, I did not curve this exam."

Her words elicit multiple moans and groans from the class. Someone in the back row swears audibly.

"No curve means that some of you are finally learning the material," Dr. Hahn asserts. "One person scored an 88.5% on this exam, which is the highest grade in all three sections of honors chemistry. The test results fall nicely within a standard deviation curve, with most of you scoring somewhere in the middle, a lesser amount of you scoring slightly above or below average, and a small few of you besting the exam or failing it."

Dr. Hahn begins to walk up and down the aisles, distributing the blue books. She drops a booklet onto my desk and turns to Ranjit.

"Congratulations, Mr. Shah," she says directly to him, smiling. "I will need to make my test questions harder."

"Th-thank you," Ranjit stutters as he takes his booklet from her hands.

Students mutter amongst themselves as they watch Ranjit flip through his booklet.

So, he must have been the 88.5%, I think to myself. Good for him.

Taking a deep breath, I turn my attention to my own blue book and open to the last page.

I stare at the incriminating number scrawled at the bottom and my heart drops.

32.5%

No, no, no – this can't be right, I think desperately. Ranjit and I studied together for this exam. I understood the equations while he explained them to me, so how could I have botched the test so badly?

"Hey, can you believe it? How did you do?" Ranjit swivels excitedly towards me.

"Ah, uh—I did great!"

It's an outlandish lie, but I cannot bring myself to tell him the truth. What will he think of me once he finds out that I failed?

"That's fantastic, Cass! What did you get for the change in enthalpy in 6a? Did you get 875?"

"Sorry, I think I actually got that part wrong..."

"Damn! It was the only part I missed in question 6. Hey Taki, what did you get for 6a?"

I quietly slide my booklet into my bag as Ranjit checks his answers with another classmate. Dr. Hahn begins her lecture but I'm unable to pay attention because of the overwhelming sense of doom from the exam results. I failed. I FAILED. What am I going to do now?