desiderium || Chris sturniolo

23

*flashback*

"dear diary..a chipmunk asked me my name today.."i taunted to me with a cheeky smile

"i told him it was joe.that lie will haunt me forever"i said dramatically clutching my chest

he rolled his eyes at me and threw a scrunched bit of paper at this face,me still cackling loudly at my joke because i'm hilarious

"What are you always writing about in there anyway?"
he pushed me away from looking over his shoulder and slammed the book shut.

"It's a diary Quinn. What do you think I write in it?"  I shrugged and tried to grab the book out of his hands. He just pulled it away so it was out of my reach.

"Do you write about me in there?" I questioned looking at the leather cover of the book that Chris always had his face buried in. 

The library table we were sitting at was relatively quiet save for Chris and I's speaking.

the triplets had just turned 14 today and even when I asked him what he wanted , he just said that he wanted to go to the library and mess around just the two of us. I figured for being him he should  get a bigger celebration with all his his friends and his brothers, but this was equally as fun. 

So here we were. 

I had a few fake birds and bird seed in my bag I figured there wasn't a better birthday present out there than pranking Nick. 

"Only when you do something funny or annoying" He defended, cheeks turning pink. 

"Well give me an example. Maybe I'll start one of my own." I said trying to reach for the book again. 

He just smacked my hand away and shrugged. "I just kind of write about what I'm feeling or how my day was." 

"What did you just write?"  His cheeks turned bright pink again but he shrugged,

"Just that you and I were going to pull a prank on Nick today and that I was excited" 

I thought for a moment, "Who gave it to you?" 

"Oh! mum did. She gave us each one but I'm not so sure that the others use theirs as much." He said  Nodding my head, I scanned the library shelves.

"Could you use anything or does it have to be a book?" 

"Well, having the book kind of makes it your own. Just writing on you phone or something makes it less meaningful." He decided after a moment. 
I frowned, "Oh. Well then I'll just have to wait I guess" 

There was no way that Dad could afford buying me a journal at the moment money was quite tight. 

"Does your dad still not have a job?" Chris asked noticing the shift in my moods. 

I shook my head and shrugged before standing up. "No not yet. But I'm sure that he'll get another one soon. If there's one person in this world who can, it's him."  

Last week I had told him about what happened with my mum and how it was my fault. Seeing that he still treated me the exact same after, somehow made me feel like maybe I deserved forgiveness after all. Like maybe I wasn't as much of a monster as I thought. 

His frown quickly matched mine. "Well then I guess that your phone or paper probably works just as fine. I suppose it's not really what you write on, more how you write it."