Xoris

Chapter Thirty Nine

The wind had never been this strong. It caught in Xoris' armour, shoving him back, jostling the rock under his feet. Another gust smacked him in the chest, careening him ever closer to the edge. His body froze in terror as he caught sight of the world past the mountain's edges. W-when did I get so high? In fact, he could barely remember beginning to climb at all. The hazy feeling of the Higher Beast's will was a constant presence in his mind now, making his thoughts dull and his ability to focus dwindle. Did I lose myself again? The thought unnerved him, but there was no one else on the mountain for him to hurt, Human or Stained.

It was clear he had though, with the sky nearly closed above him, having become a darker yellow after the several turns that had passed without his knowledge. He swallowed hard. Will I even be conscious if I meet the Higher Beast? The warnings crept into his mind again, of others completely losing themselves, never snapping out of it again. He shook his head in order to clear it, brown hair tossing wildly with it. He picked up one of the stands in front of his eyes. It hadn't been cut in a while; he hadn't had the time to. I'll do it once I climb back down. The thought reassured him slightly. He would be getting down from here. He would not be losing himself, and he was not going to let the Higher Beast control him anymore. Whatever decision he made, it would be of his own volition.

The circling path he had been tracing broke off suddenly, the already unsteady ground becoming nothing but loose, jumbled rocks beneath his feet. The muscles in his calf screamed in agony as he wrenched his leg up on them, diving into a low hiss as he grit the fangs it held. He glanced up at the peak again, seeming to reach up into the edges of the crack in the sky. There was still a while to go.

It felt dangerous to touch upon the Stained energy in his body, being so close to the Higher Beast, but as a cough wracked through his leg, spitting out blood, he knew he didn't have much of a choice. Closing his eyes, he imagined his steady breath forming a staircase in his mind once again. Slowly, he drew in air, forming one invisible step, climbing it as he held it in, before finally breathing out, and starting again. I wonder if this is how magik works for Humans. He doubted it, thinking of Alaina and Merkos for a moment. Anytime he had sensed it, it had felt like a quick flaring of energy, separate from their own life source. Even the rocks of the mountain pulsed with their own form of magik, but it could hardly be called alive. No, Xoris decided. This was more like the beating of his heart, the power of his own self. It wasn't a gift from any god, if they existed at all. It was simply what he was meant to do.

The hard pressure of stone beneath his feet fell away as his body lifted just slightly into the air. He wondered for a moment if he could just shoot straight up to the top, if he focused enough, but a glance over the edge quickly told him it wasn't worth the risk. His arms tensed as his eyes maintained watching the towns below, already looking so small. Behind him, he could see the Wastelands, the yellow sand littered with people and Beasts. It was hard to make out any details, so far away, but he knew it was another battle, almost definitely the one Dydra had asked him to partake in that morning, with how close it was. He watched it for a while as figures fell from both sides, the ground coated in more and more blood. As much as he expected to feel mortified, or upset, Xoris couldn't bring himself to think much of it as he focused back on climbing. I just hope she's all right. His stomach already hung heavy with guilt for going out against her wishes. If he returned with answers, and she wasn't there for him to share it with... I would miss her.

He frowned a bit as the paper with her sketch on it floated into his mind again. She'd been so kind to him, and he practically lied to her, just to get his own answers. But it's for a good cause, right? As he pushed off another rock, launching his weightless self a little higher into the air, he caught sight of the battleground again. A sense of responsibility almost seemed to fall on him as he continued to think. This was more than him simply wanting to live with his family. I want to end this. If I can find peace, why can't others? I could save them.