seungmin awoke, bewildered and affronted by the feeling of another body pressed up against his. he blinked, once, twice, trying to adjust to the bright light of the morning so that he could make out what was going on.
a burning rage bloomed in his gut at the realisation that it was changbin, cuddling up to him, still asleep.
without any thought, seungmin let his first instinct get the best of him and he brutishly shoved the smaller boy off him, awakening him in the process and receiving large, confused eyes staring up at him.
''what the fuck, changbin?'' he jeered churlishly, glaring daggers down at the brown haired boy.
changbin scrambled up, now sitting, mumbling out many variations of apologies as he cowered in front of seungmin.
''shut the fuck up!'' seungmin barked venomously, this immediately silencing changbin.
''needy whore,'' he ridiculed, ''care to explain why you were clinging onto me like a fucking bur?''
changbin struggled to speak, a lump forming in his throat.
''i'm sorry-- i'm so--sorry,'' he trembled, succumbing to his need to sob as tears raced down his cheeks.
seungmin simply scowled, ''for fucks sake, you're so pathetic; just say it!''
the uncharitable remark drove changbin to bawl even harder than before, his face scrunching up unpleasantly as he cried.
''i won't bite,'' he quipped with an evil smirk, getting closer to the wailing boy.
''pl-please!'' changbin snivelled. why does seungmin have to be so mean?
why does seungmin change up so fast? why can he go from being so ruthlessly horrible to caring and affectionate and loveable; all of this perplexed changbin further, causing more tears to wet his soft cheeks.
''i-i just--'' he hiccuped, ''i want-- i want your affection-- it-- it's all,'' changbin whimpered, burying his face in his arms, hoping he could just disappear, ''i wanted your love-- it-- it's so nice, when you're so kind to me-- i-- i love it-'' he squeaked, ''infact, i love-- y-you at those moments. it feels so-- so good-.. but, but then you're mean again..''
seungmin raised his brows.
''oh.''
''everytime-- everytime you touch me- in-- in a caring way, i feel so.. warm. b-but then you're cold once more.''
the scornful look previously on seungmins face was now wiped off, instead he stared at changbin blankly and allowed him to go on.
''yesterday-- i missed you so bad,'' he whined, ''i wanted to-- to feel you again.. i couldn't sleep-- i'm-- i'm sorry..''
changbins face remained huddled in his arms shamefully, body spasming as he let out broken sobs.
the soft expression suddenly decorating seungmins face went completely unseen by changbin as he sniffled and whimpered.
the smaller boy then flinched at the feeling of a warm hand combing through his hair, gently rubbing his scalp.
''hey.. it's-- it's okay,'' seungmin mumbled.
changbin floundered as he felt himself being lifted up by his shoulders.
''n-no!'' he cried out. he didn't want this. he wauled as seungmin set him down onto his lap. it's all fake anyways. seungmins probably only doing this so that he wouldn't have to hear changbins horrid bawling. he'd probably go back to being his cold usual self once changbin finally quietened down.
''changbin,'' seungmin tutted, using his thumb to wipe a stray tear from one of changbins cheeks, the latter refusing to look at him.
''hey,'' he called out, voice unusually benign. silently, changbin faced him once more, expressionless. his eyes were irritated and puffy from crying, his cheeks also slightly swollen. the spark in his now dull irises was gone, and seungmin felt so bad, and his face expressed it.
''fuck-- i'm sorry. i'm sorry i reacted like this, i don't know what got into me..''
changbin sighed shakily, refusing to meet seungmins eyes.
''and i know just a simple 'sorry' definitely isn't enough.. god,'' seungmin pinched the bridge of his nose.
''it-- it's okay..'' changbin replied, quietly.
''changbin, i love you.''
his breath hitched in his throat; did he hear that right? seungmin loves him?
he could feel his face heat up.
''umm..''
seungmins eyes widened, sorrow and fear slightly clouding around his blown wide pupils.
''s-seungmin.. can you.. kiss me?'' changbin squeaked, toying with his hands.
without hesitation, seungmin connected their lips in a delicate kiss.
a soft, pleasured sound escaped changbin, the blush on his face becoming more noticeable.
the kiss was short and sweet, and both boys panted ever so softly when they pulled away.
seungmins expression was inanimate, however his eyes revealed the amount of love he had for changbin, as he pulled him closer by his waist.
changbin was quick to embrace the other in a tight hug, pushing himself against him as much as he could, wanting to be as close as possible.
seungmin hugged back, nuzzling against changbins neck.
''let's go back to sleep, hm?'' seungmin muttered, gently pushing changbin back-first onto the bed.
the latter beamed up at him, cheeks glowing; ''y-yeah, okay.''
once seungmin lay down, changbin crawled atop of him, immediately cuddling up to him.
''i--i forgive you seungmin..''
