The Crowd That Kept Us Apart // colorado avalanche

chapter 3

"I think these PJs will fit ya!" I said when I handed him dinosaur pj's.

"Man Landy wasn't joking when he said you had some embarrassing ones!" I gave him an offended look, "I'll go put these on, and please find something so I can bandage that hand."

"You got it," I rummaged through my kitchen and found a small first aid kit. Newy came back. "You look mighty comfy in those pj's!"

"They are softer than they look." he smiled and sat down on the couch and I took a seat next to him. He took my injured hand while grabbing disinfectant. I was not prepared for how much it would sting on my open knuckles. I hissed through my teeth. "Sorry, guess I should have given more warning," we sat in silence for a long time as Newy tried to clean as much as he could. The cleaner my hand became the more I realized it was really swollen and bruised.

"It doesn't look good does it?"

"Can you move it?" I am able to barely make a fist through the pain. "Honestly, it might be broken. But, I would say get it checked out soon just to be safe."

"That's what I was thinking," Newy grabbed some bandages and started to wrap my sore hand. As he did so a question itched at the back of my mind. I hesitated to ask him. I bit my bottom lip.

"You can ask."

"Huh?" I questioned making eye contact with Newy.

"I know you want to ask about why I spent the night."

"Yeah, I actually do." Newy sighs, finishes up bandages me then sits back on the couch.

"We were in highschool, It was the championship game," he began, "If we won, it would be the first time our school won a hockey championship in 30 years," he stared at the wall and took a deep breath. "The pressure was intense, but thankfully our excitement helped drown out the fear of loss. The entire school came to watch as we played the team defending the champion title. The Minnesota Roadrunners. We were the last team expected to make it even close to the championship, but somehow we were there. Travis, our goal tender, my best friend, was the most excited out of all of us. He had been telling everyone about tonight's game and how he wasn't nervous at all, he had to prove his confidence to others, but I think he was always just trying to prove it to himself," Newy paused, "Even before the game started I knew he wasn't himself, he was never good at talking about his feelings but then again who is? He hid them well from others, he always thought he hid them from me, I was just too selfish to ask-" he sniffed a little before continuing, ''I remember first running out on the ice, the whole stadium exploded with cheers, smiles plastered on all my teammates' faces," Newy abruptly stopped talking, tears hung in his eyes, "Jeez sorry."

"Don't be, with the show I put on in the locker room I should be apologizing. Want something to drink?"

"Water would be great."

"Coming right up!" I rustle in the kitchen for a few minutes and come back with two waters.

"Thanks."

"Yeah no problem."

"The game was going great, we had the lead early on. Travis had some amazing saves. But coming into the third roadrunners tied it with 5 minutes left. We battled for a goal so hard. I've never seen so many players so exhausted yet somehow determined enough to not allow it to slow down the game. The energy of the crowd helped a lot. I had never seen that many people at a lousy high school hockey game, but it's nothing compared to the crowd now," he chuckled, "Then the clock was almost out of time, with only 27 seconds left. We needed that goal. Victory was so close we could taste it. Coach called a time out and he explained the plan. We were ready. We gathered around for the faceoff. The ref dropped the puck, the game started in a flash and we were executing the play as planned. Then in a split second the other team intercepted the puck," Newy took a sip of his water, "Luckily they ended up offside, 20 seconds left, the tension in the building was rising. We won the faceoff. Battling for the goal with ten seconds left, roadrunners able to clear it out of the zone, it would have been an icing call if Travis didn't go retrieve it. He batted the puck off to the side right into a roadrunners stick," he paused once more, I was on the edge of my seat hearing this, "He set up a roadrunner with a perfect shot, an empty net, 3 seconds left he wasted no time. The puck was in the back of the net in .4 seconds. The clock ran out in no time. Roadrunners flooded the ice, they won the championship game with 2.6 seconds left. And we lost it in .4."

"Oh gosh, I can't imagine what Travis must have felt."

"Not good, I can tell you that. He was dead quiet in the locker room. Usually he is the funniest guy there. I'll never forget the last words he said to me," 'last words?' I thought to myself. I almost forgot he was telling me the story of Travis' death, but I can't quite place how it plays in, "he said 'Alex, can you do something for me? I'm begging you please spend the night I need you' all I could say was no it was a school night I had a ton of homework and my mom would never let me. I didn't want to say no-" he choked, tears streaming down his face, I simply engulfed him in a hug, ''I wish I would've said yes because that night he took his life-" Newy buried his face in his hands, that was not what I expected, "I'm mad at myself cause I didn't save him!"

"Stop, even if you did spend the night it doesn't mean he wouldn't have done it on a different day."

"I could have at least helped, maybe he would've told me!" Newy stood up forcefully and I stood up moments after him. He started pacing the room, "I'm mad at myself but I'm mad at him, why did he take his life for a stupid mistake?"

"Maybe that wasn't the full story!" I yelled over him, "Maybe he had the weight of the world on his shoulders! Maybe he was getting bad grades in school while trying to play hockey! Maybe his girlfriend just broke up with him in front of a ton of people! Maybe he just felt like nothing was going to be ok again! Maybe he had feelings for a fan! A fan he has never met before!" tears streamed down my face. Newy's face was plastered with confusion, I didn't get why until I realized I just told him everything, every little detail that was weighing me down. "Maybe he felt like the only escape he had was death." my voice broke. His face softened. He realized what I just told him. I ran my hand through my long dark brown hair and took a deep breath.

"That's why I wanted to spend the night," Newy finally said, breaking the cold silence. I sat back down in a huff, "I can't make the same mistake I did all those years ago."