The Way We Fell

O R D A R E

Silence.

Except for Emily and the boy beside her with the blonde hair laughing.

I looked to Cam who was looking at...Elias. They seemed to be having a silent conversation.

I looked to Kenna she also looked hopeless.

I didn't want to Kiss Cam let alone make out with him.

How do you make out with someone ?

It wasn't a big deal but it was.

My mind raced with thoughts. This was never how I imagined my first kiss.

Pathetic I know. I'm a sucker for romance. I want all my firsts to be special.

This was not ideal.

"We're waiting lovebirds..."

Cam began smirking he stood up very slowly. He really was going to do this.

I didn't want to.

Do I have to ?

Kenna as if she read my mind said "You don't have to do this ?"

JT nodded along with her.

"Oh shut up let her..." I looked to Emily who was enjoying this thoroughly.

I stood up on wobbly knees. I felt numb.

I don't have to do this.

I saw Elias sit up straighter from where he was on the couch.

I stepped closer to Cam.

He finished the step and stood directly above me. The smirk still apparent on his face.

I don't have to do this.

I kept repeating the phrase in my head.

"Get it over with" The blonde boy yelled.

Cam looked down at me...

"Do you want to do this ?"

I contemplated it. This should be my choice.

I let people walk all over me but this...this is my choice and i'm not going to let someone like Emily take my choices away from me. I let it happen way to much.

"No" I said strongly my new found voice coming from god knows where.

I don't want to.

Cam immediately stepped back and I could've sworn I saw Elias's shoulders relax.

"You're a shit show" Emily yells.

The next thing happened so fast one minute I was turning to go sit back down next to Kenna who was looking at me with a proud mamas smile and then I was being grabbed by my waist another hand on my breast I was turned around and felt lips push into mine.

I shrieked pushing against the person. They dug in deeper.

I pushed and pushed.

Seconds later I was being pulled back and the first person I saw was Elias pounding his fist into the blonde boy who was already on the floor.

I was breathing so hard.

I could hear Kenna's faint voice.

Emily screaming.

JT yelling Elias's name.

What just happened to me ?

Was I assaulted ?

Tears began to flow and flow and they didn't stop.

Why am I crying ?

And suddenly everything hit me all at once...

I needed to leave right now.

I could hear myself breathing heavily. Hyperventilating.

I grabbed my stuff off the floor and took a look to see the blonde on the floor bloody nose.

I turned my head and saw Cam and JT holding both Elias's hands back while he looks directly at me.

Why would he do that ?

I couldn't deal with this I felt like the walls were closing in.

I needed to get out of here.

I breathed even harder if possible.

I ran out the door.

I walked through crowds of people and heavy music.

I made it outside and I stepped onto the lawn and threw my guts up. Heaving and coughing.

I collected myself and I walked. I didn't stop I kept walking until I hit a narrow path. I had no idea where this led.

I felt empty and disgusting.

My body was shaking and I couldn't tell if it was cold or not. I was just shaking and I couldn't stop.

I wanted to just disappear in that moment.

I walked and walked for god knows how long. My feet were aching as I kept reliving what had happened.

The grab.

The intake of my last breath before he put his lips on mine.

The pushing.

It was all but a few seconds but I swear it felt like years.

I just wanted to have fun today. I wanted to forget about my dad and the problems. I wanted to be normal for once.

I cried so much my sobs echoed through the empty streets.

Just as I was about to turn a corner I heard an engine rev behind me...

The car slowed down I turned my head inwards to avoid contact.I was preparing myself to run. I've had enough for one day.

"Get in" A deep voice said.

I froze in place.

I know that voice.