Derek: hotch going feral >> kinda sexy 😳 😏
JJ: wait I thought the popcorn machine burnt down???
Rossi: I bought a new one bc the oven stopped working and Strauss screamed at me:(
Emily: I'll kill her it's okay mama Rossi 😼
Derek: daddy dave😵😝💖
Hotch: Oh.
Y/n: what now⁉️😭
Derek: I've spoken too much.
Reid: You concern me sometimes, Morgan.
Derek: yk what's concerning me? Why tf u ain't in my bed rn 🤨🙄🙄👹👹
Garcia: Sleepover!!! >:]
Garcia: oh wait u meant it a different way nvm.
Emily: Horny ass mfer😭😭 #gaypeople 💔
JJ: it's okay pen you can have a sleepover with me and em (non sexual) 💖
Hotch: hate that you had to clarify due to the nature of this groupchat.
Y/n: hotch let's have a sleepover (sexual)
Y/n: hey who said that? Omg😟😟
Y/n: unless...
Derek: threesome?🥺💖⁉️⁉️
Hotch: I just sighed so loud
Emily: in disappointment or are you getting freaky up in that office of yours by yourself and telling us for no good reason 🤨🤨
Y/n: WHY DO YOU ACCUSE EVERYONE OF MASTURBATING IN THEIR OFFICES BRO FIRST ROSSI AND NOW HOTCH💀
Hotch: my blinds are literally open I do not do that
Derek: *without me😼🤤😍😍 under his desk as we speak 😝😝
Derek: I am so sorry .
JJ: THE DIRECT APOLOGY. 💀😭
Hotch: I have 0 words. None.
Emily: those r words idiot.
Y/n: DONT CALL HIM AN IDIOT💀💀
Derek: hotchy milk🤤🤤
Emily: OMG?? IM FUCKING DEAD SHUT UP 💀💀
Hotch: Pardon..?
Reid: Hotch has milk..? Why?
Derek: idk why he has balls go to him urself😮💨😮💨 gosh
Reid: That is not what..
Y/n: Reid, he wasnt referring to cow milk...
Reid: Soy?
Derek: cum.
Hotch: yk what that's it
*'Hotch' removed 'Derek' from the chat*
Emily: WOOO LETS GOO !!! WORLD PEACE!!
Y/n: HES HEADING TO ROSSIS OFFICE YALL ALREADY KNOW WHATS GOING DOWN💀😭
Rossi: someone please get Derek out of my office I'm doing paperwork and he's whining like a bimbo
JJ: A BIMBO😭😭🐆
YOU ARE READING
BAU groupchat + Reader
Fanfictionhow I think the BAU team would text eachother except you're also on the team dealing with their antics Some stuff is out of character and I exaggerated their personalities for comedic value, enjoy!
