appearance

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It's been a 6 weeks since my break down in the closet and meredith and all of her class are going to take there boards so it will be lexie and I surviving on our own.
" good luck," I yell as the bus drives off.
Lexie and I are finally off our 48 hour shift my 17th birthday has been and gone and honestly they are so pointless to celebrate now they just get boring.
We walk to the car in silence we are just so tired of today we had a mass casualty situation with was well some would say carnage.
" you ok," lexie asks me, I'm so tired that I nod.

We pull up to the house by that point I was out like a light,I feel a prod a groan I force my eyes awake," I awake," I say opening the door, I walk up the stairs collapsing on my bed," mind if I join you," lexie say joining me on the bed with me  responding I rest my head on her chest listing to her heart beat drifting into a gentle sleep.

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"Morning," I say stretching my arms, I looking at lexie smiling at her phone.
" evening, it 6pm,"she says looking around my room.
"Dam, I was tired," I say running my hands through my hair.
"Evidently," says going to stand up but kinda fall back on the bed.
"I'm going to the store,want anything,"lexie asks me.
" can you put gas in my car please also the book,not a happy family,"I say she nods before leaving the room.

Around an 1 hour  later there's a knock at the door, I drag myself out of my bed and stumble down the stairs. The door bangs again." Lexie, did you....,"I say as I open the door stunned at who it is.
"What are you doing here,"I ask rider who is stood swaying on the porch," are you drunk," I ask straight after.
"I wanted to see you and no I'm not," he responded pushing past me to enter the house.
"Rider, you broke it off not me,plus your drunk,"I say shutting the door even though I don't want him here.
" yeh well I shouldn't have," he yells turning around to face me,"I have made so many mistakes, over these last 4 months with out you, I kicked off the football team, my grade have plummeted, I have to repeat this year of school,no of that happened when I was with or when benji died, only after I broke it off," he starts off yelling but gets quieter as he finishes.
  " it took me months to get over you, you,you can't just walk back into my life,"  I yell," I've had enough of people walking in and leaving," I'm going back to my room, sleep on the couch if you want I'll leave so advil and water on the coffe table, we will continue this conversation when you are sober," I say placing a glass of water and the advil down on the table, I look up and see he is passed out on the floor already and I know I can't pick him up so he can stay there. As I get to the bottom of the stairs I have tears falling down my face but I hear the door open to see lexie stood there with 5 bags of shopping," you ok," she asks closing the door.
" Yeah, tonight has been eventful," I say grabbing the shopping off her," you went to buy tequila why do you have so much stuff," I wisper.
" why are you whispering,"she Questions putting stuff away.
"Oh ex boyfriend showed up, and is passed out drunk on the floor hence the crying," I say trying to laugh it off," I'm gonna go to bed I have a lot of thing to do tomorrow,night lex," I say exiting the room.

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I barely slept last night after the random appearance off the ex boyfriend, if Alex was at home not at work we would probably have a murder charge right now,I get up and grab some shorts and a t-shirt, little did I know it was one of riders old ones he left here." God my head hurts," I hear as I walk in the living room.
" well that's what you get for drinking, underage may i add," I laugh.
"Wait lily," he says sounding very surprised," is that my shirt,"he adds.i look down to see I am wearing his iron man t-shirt that was left here and never collected after the break up.
"What are you doing here rider,"I ask as I can't have him here it brings up far to many feelings I have finally pushed down.
"Well um what did I say last night first,"he asks scratching his head trying to remember,"never mind, got it, everything I said last night was true, I regret ever ending it, I'm sorry for that," he says.
"Rider you made your bed now you have to lie in it, It took me so long to get over you and I'm finally hap..." As I go to finish the sentence he kisses me, don't get me wrong if he did this 3 months ago I would have melted, but I don't feel anything for him anymore, he is still kissing me as I hear the door open I know that Alex isn't ment to be home until tonight but that's his voice and merediths.
"Anything, is there any chance that you still love me," he asks his eyes glancing over.
"I will always love, but not in the way you want me to anymore," I respond before Alex steps into the room.
"Rider, I think it's best you leave," Alex says stepping in between us.
" see you around, I guess,"rider says leaving the house.

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