V9S2 Nosey Neighbors...

Chapter 4: Chupacabra In The Hen House...

{*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^}*-Simon-*-Simon-*-Simon-*-Simon-*-Simon-*{*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^}

"Merge left, take second exit."

Simon huffed, glancing over his shoulder, moving over, taking the off ramp before reaching forward, turning off the voice directions with a bit more force than necessary.

They were unnecessary. Yeah between the construction on Main and the jack-knifed big rig over on 4th it was kind of an oddball route the GPS was sending them on but it didn't seem like it'd add too much time.

Besides traffic, detours and gridlock just means he had more time before he had to deal with the fallout of his daring escape. He'd happily take gridlock over the judgey sighs, righteous indignation and never-ending lecture awaiting him from Alec and even more of the confusing, irritating, distracting Raphael-ness he had in store.

Hmm...Who knew there could be an upside to the hassle of road construction?

Yeah turning off the GPS blabber was definitely the right move. Maybe he can miss a turn or two, get lost and prolong the fallout that much longer. If they get off track it'll just recalculate, they'll get there eventually...he had more important things on his mind right now.

-appropriate for a first date.'

'And you will tell me when it is right?'

'I'm free tomorrow...'

Ugh...ass.

What a TOTAL jackass.

How is it even possible for a freaking government assassin to be that damn obnoxious?

The man is a trained killer. He is literally lethal. Someone that dangerous shouldn't be capable of that level of aggravation. It's dangerous 's what it is, practically asking for trouble. Like putting a fox in charge of the hen house...

Hell scratch 'fox', more like putting a freaking Chupacabra in charge of the hen house. More lethal, sneakier, more unsettling, and quite possibly not of this world...definitely more apt.

Plus this whole thing just really sucks...and freaking Raphael's a big part of why so...yeah...going with the Chupacabra.

Stupidly pretty, flirty, irritating as hell Chupacabra...

Ugh...

Like yeah sure, technically the chickens are safe from outside threats but only until the Chupacabra gets hungry...or bored...or one insanely stupid chicken with a computer virus in its brain and a death wish decides to squawk incessantly, fluff up and peck at the damn Chupacabra because it got distracted and irritated and mistook the Chupacabra for another chicken.

How's he supposed to keep the 'Dangerous Predator' warning in his head when the predator is equal parts inviting and infuriating? The dangers there...the predators there, right in plain sight. It's just hidden behind a disarming, appealing visage. It's like the proverbial wolf in sheep's clothing...or a Chupacabra in Chicken's clothing or...uh...w-wait...

Umm...okay this is getting away from him...he now has a mental image of a smiling Chupacabra with a feathery coat trying to chat up chickens...he went off into the weeds somewhere but even so, it still fits.

Shouldn't there be some kind of rule against someone that dangerous also being that irritatingly appealing (or appealingly irritating as the situation dictates)? I mean if you have the ability to kill someone with your freaking pinky you shouldn't also have the ability to distract and/or irritate them so much that they FORGET about the first ability. That first ability should always be forefront in your mind.