Sherlock (x Reader) Chatroom

The Competition

John has logged on.

John has started a chatroom.

Sherlock has logged on.

(y/n) has logged on.

Moriarty has logged on.

Lestrade has logged on.

Mary has logged on.

Mycroft has logged on.

(y/n): Just a warning; John is still really mad about the tea incident.

Lestrade: That wasn't even our fault!

(y/n): He's still pissed, though.

John: (y/n), if you date any of them, I will kill them.

(y/n): See?

Sherlock: I wonder which one of us she would date...

*pause*

Mycroft: It would be me.

Lestrade: Are you kidding? It would be me.

Sherlock: You two are both idiots, it would definitely be me.

(y/n): Do I have a say in this...?

Lestrade: Why would she date you, Sherlock? Everyone you meet wants to punch you in the face.

(y/n): Apparently not...

Sherlock: That's their problem, not mine.

Mycroft: She would date me. I'm the British government.

Sherlock: Yeah, and you're obsessed with umbrellas. I'm pretty sure you're dating one.

Mycroft: Well, how do we know that you're not dating John?

Sherlock: What

John: Do not bring me into this!

John: And I'm married! Gosh!

Lestrade: It could be a cover up to try to hide your true feelings...

Mary: LOL

John: Screw all of you!

John has logged off.

Mary: I was just kidding!

Mary has logged off.

Sherlock: Why would she date you two anyway? You're both old!

Mycroft: Excuse me

Lestrade: I'm not old!

Sherlock: You have gray hair.

Lestrade: ...It's not gray... it's silver... gosh...

Mycroft: Why on earth would she date you, Sherlock?

Sherlock: MY HAIR IS AMAZING!

Mycroft: YOUR HAIR LOOKS LIKE A DIRTY MOP!

Sherlock: AT LEAST I HAVE HAIR!

Mycroft: ...

Lestrade: Oh burn

Moriarty: Shit just went down

Mycroft: I will kill you

Sherlock: Psh, I'm not afraid of you.

(y/n): Instead of arguing, just ask me instead! Are you really that stupid?!

Sherlock: (y/n)?!

Lestrade: We kind of forgot you were here...

(y/n): Yeah. Well, for the record, I wouldn't date any of you.

Sherlock: ...

Lestrade: ...

Mycroft: ...

(y/n): Yeah.

(y/n): THE NEWEST EPISODE OF DOCTOR WHO IS ON! Gotta go!

(y/n) has logged off.

Lestrade has logged off.

Moriarty has logged off.

Sherlock: My hair doesn't look like a dirty mop...

Mycroft: LOL! Yeah, it does.

Sherlock: At least I'm not an old man.

Sherlock has logged off.

Mycroft: ...am not...

Mycroft has logged off.

Chatroom has closed.