Reaching the Top

CHAPTER FIVE

"Do not be deceived, God is not mocked, for whatever a man sows, that he will also reap," (Galatians 6:7)

It had been two months since I started working and I was having the time of my life even though I had some nights of torment. Everyone at work loved me somehow, but then that really didn't come across as something noteworthy. I was excellent with my work and reliable. Grace's graduation was the following Saturday and I was to fly home on Friday.

"Yes fly...I could afford it now though I was grieving my wallet."

The couple of the moment would pick me up at the airport and take me home...I could picture it all perfectly.

It was on a Wednesday and I was on my way to the cafeteria when suddenly my head felt lighter. I had been feeling drowsy sometimes in the mornings but I hadn't thought much of it. Suddenly I had a dizzy spell before I collapsed in Paul's arms who had been close to me.

The next time I opened my eyes I was on a hospital bed with Hannah holding my hand.

'What happened...is this heaven?' I mused and in spite of the scare, Hannah smiled.

"Really?" she said and I grinned.

We didn't stay long after my waking up as the doctor had got all he needed after he had asked for a urine test. He had asked if I wanted him to speak to me in private but I told him there was no reason to chuck Hannah out since she had come this far.

"After all she is my friend and there isn't anything worth hiding," I had said innocently until he had said the last thing on my mind.

"Congratulations, you are two months pregnant."

I was beyond shocked by the news that I almost fainted again but Hannah was there to keep me sane although she didn't comment. She just made sure I was okay and arranged that I take the remaining days of the week off, only to report for work the following week of which I did not object.

I was sleepless for most of the night back in my flat as my mind was in spectacular overdrive trying to arrive at a decision. I could abort and no one would ever find out or I could carry the pregnancy and give birth to a bastard which would be the ultimate blow - talk about the shame I'd cause my family; the very thought of it made me want to just die, I mean it'd all be so simple except that I would be twice a murderer and heaven wouldn't be my home.

"Some Christian you are...but you still have the upper hand...whatever you decide, you are still condemned...condemned...condemned!!" the devil again.

"If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and cleanse us from all unrighteousness." (1 John 1:9)

The Holy Spirit was always gentle...

The battle for my soul it was.

Gracie's graduation day came and I woke up with a heavy heart. Yes, I had made it to Harare by air, yes, I had been picked up by my favorite couple and yes, I was home with my mum and Dad, but I felt like an alien. They were so happy to see me, so happy I was doing well and was on my way to the top as I'd always wanted and so happy Gracie was graduating but I felt anything but happy. I mean how could I be happy when I was carrying a mistake in my belly.

I felt like I was walking on eggshells when we finally graced the graduation ceremony. My emotions were all over the place and half the time I was absent-minded. Gracie however could not have me spoil her day but she had made a point of pulling whatever it was out of me when the day was over.

"I really hate that I can see through you sometimes," she had said as I helped her dress up, "But I'll just pretend I'm blind because I don't want to think of you as a party pooper."