| Oedipussy |

Scene 5

[Enter Random Civilians 1-4]

Random Civilian 1:

What the fuck just happened...?

Random Civilian 2:

I-I have no idea...

Random Civilian 3:

Well who the fuck is gonna be the new choir bitches???

Random Civilian 2:

I mean they left the cue cards here...

Random Civilian 1:

Damn I guess we've gotta become the new choir bitches

Random Civilian 4:

Bro I can't even fucking read – I'm out...

[Exit Random Civilian 4]

Random Civilian 2:

Fucking Jared...

Random Civilian 3:

Damn I guess we've got no choice

Random Civilian 2:

[clears throat] Uhh, wise prophecy dude – stirring fear and dread and shit. Mans was talking shit – there's no way he's right.

Random Civilian 1:

My hope is, um, fluttering...? Fluttering around and shit...? And I have no clear glimpse of the future or the past and we witnessed it??? [lowering voice] wait what did we witness???

Random Civilian 2:

Uhh... I don't know – let's...let's just skip to the next line

Random Civilian 3:

He passed the test and endeared himself to the entire city [lowering voice] who the fuck are we even talking about

Random Civilian 1:

[lowering voice] I don't fucking know man, just keep going

Random Civilian 3:

Uhhhh, so, whomever the fuck we're talking about is... guilty????

[Enter Crapbag, looking confused]

Crapbag:

Hey, do y'all know what the fuck is going on???? I left for like five minutes and now Oedipussy is calling be a two-timing lying-ass traitor-bitch... Like what the fuck did I do??

Random Civilian 2:

Oh, yeah, I have no idea – we're not even the real choir bitches... I'm pretty sure it had something to do with Tires Sus, though

Crapbag:

Please don't tell me he told everyone

Random Civilian 3:

Oh, no, he DEFINITELY told everyone

Crapbag:

FUCK.

Random Civilian 1:

Maybe it had to do with you not buying him Dairy Queen

Crapbag:

Wait, how do you know that but not official declaration from the fucking king????

Random Civilian 2:

OH SHIT HE'S COMING

Crapbag:

Fucking hell

[Crapbag turns towards one side of the stage, leaving Random Civilians 1-3 in the center]

Random Civilian 2:

Okay, we're really unqualified for this we need the fucking choir bitches back

Random Civilians 1 & 3:

Definitely.

[Exit Random Civilians 1-3, probably on their way to reunite the choir bitches]