Clan // OrchidClan (a Clan made up of rogues, loners, kittypets, and Clan cats. They live in the meadow and is welcoming to visitors that are wandering by. They eat normal prey stuff and some birds. Current leader is Blossomstar).
Wow, I love the unique clan name! OrchidClan seems like a very interesting place to be. I wonder who made it and why they are so welcoming?
Gender // non-binary; they/them
Nice to see a non-binary character!
Age // 6 ½ moons
So a very young apprentice.
Rank // Apprentice
Okay.
Personality // Kind, happy, awesome, cool, introvert, outgoing, sometimes manipulative, caring, fierce, Loyal, scared sometimes. Hard-working, and passionate.
This is rather confusing, because you've stated how they're outgoing and an introvert, how they're caring yet manipulative, and how they're fierce and sometimes scared. A lot of these traits contradict with each other and it seems a little muttery and jumbled up. It would be great if you could make Tree's traits more clear and less mixed up. Good job other than that. (5/10)
Appearance // A gray-ginger tabby with hazel eyes.
Okay! Because they're non-binary, I'm not really sure how their genes would be passed down, so you can get away with that (lol). I would suggest maybe adding a bit more detail to their appearance. They look very typical and realistic so far though. (9/10)
Backstory // Tree was named after what their mother saw after they were born. Tree had a sibling named Quillkit. When they were 3 moons, a battle broke out between OrchidClan and HawkClan, which caused the leader of OrchidClan to lose a life. Tree didn't really understand what was going on at the time, and was nearly taken by one of the warriors of HawkClan. Sun saved them though. Tree was then made an apprentice at the age of 5 ½ moons old, and was made into a warrior apprentice. Tree was exploring the territory with their mentor, when suddenly a cat jumped out of the bushes, attacking Tree. Tree somehow managed to escape and ran into the bush, and their mentor started attacking the cat. The battle went on for a while, Tree was helping the kits and other apprentices. OrchidClan won and let peace go down for awhile. (Up to 6 ½ moons old)
Neat! The naming part is a bit iffy though, but all's good. Maybe you can explain why HawkClan and OrchidClan are on bad terms? And why Tree became an apprentice a bit early? Maybe you could also explain how these skirmishes affected his personality and view on the world? This looks very good so far though, great job! (8/10)
Relationships //
Mother - Sun, a ginger tabby with light blue eyes.
Okay! She seems possible, but the blue eyes are a bit iffy because she doesn't seem to be described with any white on her. Maybe she's a white-and-ginger tabby? That would be a bit more realistic with her eye color.
Father - Grayflame, an old Clan cat who has gray fur and is a tabby with hazel eyes.
Grayflame is a very pretty name! He seems realistic and a gray tabby with hazel eyes is definitely possible for cats.
Sister - Quillpaw, a ginger furred she-cat with blue eyes.
She looks good, but the same thing that I stated about her mother. Additionally, she would probably be a calico or dilute calico, because one of her parents carries a ginger gene while the other a black gene (grey tabbies are diluted brown/black tabbies). The blue eyes seem a little unrealistic, again, but it's fine and Quillpaw seems genetically accurate enough! (7/10)
Other // Tree was born as a loner and half-Clan between LightningClan (old Clan that their father was in). Tree is a great hunter and a helper.
Okay! Maybe you could explain a bit more about LightningClan in the backstory, but Tree looks good! (N/A for Other//)
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Thank you ivebolt for the submission (again)! Tree is an amazing character yet has lots of room for improvement. I hope you found this rating helpful and have a great day!
✰ Here's an extra graphic of Tree that I made in Canva! ✰
(it took me so long to find a good picture qwq)
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