Fangs (Hiatus)

Chapter 15: Worth

~A/N~ 

Thank you @beekinz for writing this chapter as well!

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~N's pov~

I let my head hit the wall as I was taken back to (however long ago the v rejection thing happened). I remember her hitting me hard across the face as a gold necklace fell out of my hand and skidded across the hard ground that I was now cowered below her on. Her face looked like pure hatred and disgust. "You useless drone. Why the hell do you think I would want a stupid necklace? WE. NEED. OIL. Not some stupid sentimental gifts. You are terrible. Go back to the tower, you stupid idiot." Dejected, I walked back to the tower. Her words echoed in my head, repeating louder and louder. I trudged in the snow, legs heavy, knowing that when I got back, I would have to explain why I was empty handed, and then J would give me a more stern lecture. I snapped back to reality. My thoughts flooded my mind as I curled up on the old bench I was sitting on. What if Uzi did the same thing to me? What if she was just coming along so I wouldn't be sad? Wasting her own time, to make me happy. She probably thought I was useless, when I came back to the tower with no oil. She probably will snap and hit me like V did. What is stopping her from beating the crap out of me? My thoughts grew louder and louder like V's words that day. I could practically see how Uzi would react. She would kick me to the ground and yell at me. She would say everything that's on her mind, everything that she has been holding in from when she met me until now. How I've never actually brought oil back to the tower for us, how I always try too hard yet somehow still manage to fail, and how if I died, it would make no difference to how they live. They could survive just as fine without me. Heck, they could even live BETTER without me, going around, taking up space and resources, wasting my breath expressing my love for her rather than doing something to help everyone. If Uzi was really that nice from the start, she would've already killed you out of pity. My thoughts took a sharp turn at this point. You stupid sack of metal. Why would Uzi do the same as V? You are terrible for even thinking this would happen with Uzi. She is too nice for you. You don't deserve her, or anything. V was just sparing you her mercy that day. She could've killed you. She should've. She was right. You really are useless. Have you really not noticed? We needed oil. DESPERATELY. However, like the worthless lump of metal you are, you've come up empty handed again, wasting your time and Uzi's time effectively with this rundown moldy mall. Uzi could've been doing something productive right now. She could've been at the tower, enjoying herself with the others, chatting with the others. If only V could have just ended my life, on that day when I tried to give her the necklace, maybe Uzi and the others wouldn't be suffering. Uzi would be free to love someone better than me. She deserves better than me. Do I have a single redeeming quality? I made a mental checklist of the traits of someone Uzi deserves. Strong, agile, smart, hot (maybe you could even say.... hot as balls........), charming personality, and useful. I'm not strong at all. Mentally or physically. I couldn't be as strong as V or J. Certainly not as strong as the new drones that recently joined us on this desolate little planet of ours. They definitely were buffed and improved. That goes with agility too. They were probably more agile than I could ever dream of. J and V are so smart. Smarter than I could ever be. So many times, I could've made better decisions that would've been smarter, however I haven't. It's all because I'm stupid. I'm not even good looking. I've been shown to be useless multiple times before as well, and my personality is nowhere near charming or likable. Why has Uzi put up with me all this time? I let my thoughts overtake me.