The Thief and the Globetrotter

Chapter Six: The Miserable

Jasper.

He cringed, but answered anyway.

"There's a police investigation on and you've decided to go shopping?" If it wasn't Diego judging him, it was Jasper.

Baz freed up his hands, shouldering the phone to his ear while he wrangled buttons into their holes.

"I know what I'm doing," Baz said.

"Forgive me for doubting that very much." Jasper sure sounded concerned for someone whose fingerprints weren't all over Rei Collingwood's library and closet.

"Look, I have a lead. You stuck me in a tuxedo, now I have a standard to uphold," Baz said. The rules of black tie were much more straightforward. The business casual thing was a mystery to him. How much business was too much business and how much casual was too much casual?

"Who'd you bring with you?"

Baz froze, blinking at his own reflection a few times.

"Is that a threat?" he asked, "you're following me around now?"

Silence. Baz didn't care for that at all.

"Just remember what your goal is here," Jasper said.

Baz liked their arrangement a lot better when Jasper only called when there was a job and they only saw each other in the back of a black sedan. "I know. Find Rei or find myself in county jail. I didn't forget."

"Make sure that you don't."

Jasper hung up on him. Rude, but Baz's expectations for Jasper were set low as far as social conduct was concerned.

He stared into the reflection, finding it hard to see himself in the mirror. It used to be fine. He used to just be a guy with a talent for jumping over walls and climbing up buildings in the middle of the night. As soon as Baz stepped out of the black sedan, he was done until the next time Jasper called.

That was what their arrangement was supposed to be, but did Baz really have any say in the matter?

His phone vibrated in his hand and for a second, he expected to see Jasper's name light up across the screen again, tacking on another task, another threat.

It wasn't.

U dead in there? Just Diego. Baz reminded himself to breathe as he un-business casual-ed himself.

Baz found Diego leaning up against a rack, letting the blonde talk at him while he nodded somewhat appropriately, still scrolling through his phone. The smile Baz offered was forced, but Diego didn't glance up enough to notice. That, or he was just too nonchalant to mention it.

"I found you some socks," Diego said.

"Socks?" Baz asked.

"Socks, you uncultured chicken nugget." Diego all but rolled his eyes. If Baz really was Tarzan, walking amongst the civilized folk for the first time, maybe Diego would've been a little more sympathetic. "You can't wear your damn white socks with dress shoes. Jesus, Baz, do you even have a pair of dress shoes?"

"I did..." Baz braced for judgment, "I threw them off a roof."

He didn't dare mention that he'd skipped socks altogether when donning a tuxedo. His footwear of choice just hadn't allowed for it. Saying that out loud would've melted Diego's brain.

Diego stared at him, blinking through his disbelief. "Lord, give me strength," he muttered under his breath, eyes darting up, "well, pay and come on, then."

Baz put on his fake innocent, naive smile and Diego just shook his head, wandering away to psych himself up for round two of shopping with an unfashionable clod.