Special [Zianourry]

Chapter 15

"Boobear..." Harry murmured, and I tried to open my eyes. "We're here now, it's okay."
"Hazza." I breathed, pressing my face into the warm hand against my cheek. My eyes fluttered open, to meet his bright, green eyes, looking down at me. "Where am I?"
"We're just getting out of the plane, boo." He said quietly, stroking the hair back from my eyes. Everything came rushing back to me, and I winced.
"I'm sorry." Forcing myself to sit up, I felt panic enclose my heart again as I wondered if they were going to want to take a break, or split up forever, or leave me totally -
"Boobear, calm. We're not going anywhere." Harry emphasised his words. "Don't panic again, please."
"I'm sorry, I just..." Rubbing my hands over my face, I tried to relax. "I've been okay since I came to the school about panic attacks, and then, I just..."
"It's okay. I'm never leaving you, even if you leave me." Harry whispered, hugging me tightly. I wrapped my arms around him, closing my eyes contentedly, relief washing over me that they weren't leaving me.
"Haz? Lou? We're getting out, come on." Liam leaned around to where we were sitting, eyes raking over me, before continuing in a softer voice. "You good, Lou?"
"I'm fine." With a smile, I got up, linking my fingers through Harry's and walking out of the plane, jumping to the ground. Wind blew at my hair lightly, and I surveyed the area. "It's strange to be back."
"Well, get used to it. We've got months to go." Zayn drawled, walking up behind us, draping his arms over my shoulders. I leaned back into his embrace, letting him hold me there for a minute.
"Good to see you all back in one piece!" Miss Aberny smiled at us all, her gaze lingering on me. They'd been told about Finn, and probably Trixie. "Well, you start tomorrow as normal. Don't worry about work you've missed, you can read up on it, all homework set during that time doesn't apply to any of you. I'll see you all in class." She moved off, and we walked towards our dormitories, dragging suitcases with us.
"Louis." A quiet voice said, and we all turned to see Max, Jake and Reece standing there. "Glad to see you back."
"Thanks." I smiled at them, but I tried to forget about Finn, about the worry they held with them. Niall gave them a broad grin, his excitability relieving the tension. "Have a good day."
"You, too, mate." Jake nodded to me, and we moved off. Once we made it to our dorms, Liam unlocked the door, holding it open for us.
"So strange..." Harry sighed, trailing a hand along the furniture. It didn't smell like home anymore, and I watched as Niall snuggled up to Harry, giving him a Horan hug as an afterthought.
"Please tell me about Finn." I said quietly. They all fell silent. "Please."
"Lou, it's best if you don't -" Zayn started.
"They're after me." They all stared at me in a mixture of shock and horror. "I - I read his diary. They're - they're coming after me. I need to know."
"Later, Lou. Let's just, er, settle in, first?" Liam bargained, kissing me gently before wrapping me up in a tight hug. Reluctantly, I agreed, starting to unpack my suitcases and hang my clothes up, replacing random items and leaving some things I had bought with me on top of my drawers.
Later that evening, I was eating dinner with my boyfriends when someone tapped me on my shoulder. Turning around, I saw Nick and Kat, and smiled at them.
"Hey, Lou." Nick greeted me.
"Hi." I grinned at them.
"U-um, I'm sorry if this is bad timing..." Kat started, and I could see she had been crying from the redness in her eyes. "But I needed to tell you that we've got two people originally from Team Two on our team now, b-because..." Tears welled up in her eyes, and I forced the nothingness to feel me.
All emotions drained away, and I stared at her almost unseeingly. "Fine. Who's leader?"
"Me. Practice's as normal." Nick said quietly. Nodding silently, I watched as they both offered me slight smiles before leaving again.
"Lou?" Zayn asked me gently, taking my hand in both of his. I turned to look at him, the nothing inside of me making them wince at my empty eyes.
I couldn't feel. I was stone. I was icy.
I was nothing.
*********************************************************
"Don't hurt her! Please... please..." His voice cracked, tired from the abuse, tired from pleading. Slowly, the girl woke, her gentle eyes darkened in pain, she felt every muscle tense and her hands began to open and close with each quickening breath as the person approached.
"Leave her. Not again, please, just hurt me instead!" Finn gasped, the blood trickling down his face stopping him from breathing, stopping him from fighting. A crack sounded, his head whipped to the side, and blood poured from the cut in his cheek. "Don't... hurt... her..."
"Watch, little girly. Is this what you're doing to him? Your pwecious little boyfriend?" The taunting voice forced her to watch, the huge, gaping wound across the length of her face mottled with clotted blood and fragments of dirt that had blown up in her thrashing. She couldn't talk, just stared into their darkened eyes, hate radiating from her as the whip cracked down, drawing a scream from him and another, endless, stream of blood.
"Tell him to tell us where he is... you can both go, free." They offered, but she shook her head firmly. "Very well, girly." Clothes were shredded to the floor, exposing her battered flesh, ridden with cuts, scrapes and bruises that changed her skin into a canvas of depression.
"Don't you dare!" Finn screamed suddenly, as they moved towards her. "No!"
"Would you rather it was you? Or neither of you?"
"Yes. Please. Anyone but Trix." The pain in his once bright, blue eyes was evident, the signs of a losing fight clear in his limp, thinned frame, dull life behind his eyes, the way his hair was dirty and matted, the bruises and cuts still dripping blood.
"Shame, boys. Make him watch. Then, take him as well."
A piercing scream left the young man's throat as they descended upon his lover, her lifeless eyes staring hopelessly into his until they fell shut.
*********************************************************
My nightmare woke me with a start. Once again, my gut told me it was what was happening, and I prayed, prayed desperately that they weren't about to do what I thought they might.
Slowly, I got up, dragging myself into the lounge, and outside, following an automatic path, my mind unfeeling, not telling my body how to act, just blindly following what I was doing.
Cold air struck me as I stepped onto the roof, wandering over to the side and looking across the school grounds. They were huge, the road to the city and the forest stretching out over the horizon.
My mind went blank as I collapsed. The nothing had returned.
I couldn't feel.
*********************************************************
"Louis, you idiot." Someone scolded me tiredly. "What'd you do that for?"
"Li?" I mumbled, burrowing my head into the person's chest.
"Why were you on the roof?" He sighed, hugging me tightly. "You're freezing."
"I- I don't know." With the awareness being carried by Liam bought me, I could remember the feelings of nothing, that life just whizzed by. Hurt washed over me. Finn and Trixie were being tortured and destroyed because of me.
"Let's warm you up." Warm arms pulled me into bed, the one the five of us now shared.
"Boobear, love me. Don't let this happen." Harry kissed me deeply, pulling back and staring into my eyes. "Feel something."
"I love you." I whispered back, wrapping my arms around him tightly, as my normal self started to return, and it felt like I was coming out of a dream. "I love you, Haz."