My haunting past

Chapter 25-Home

"Let's see how much you can reverse, I'm in too deep" I replied rolling my eyes

"You'll be okay, don't worry." He patted my leg. I gave him a week smile and we talked a bit more then I decided to go upstairs to talk to Ella.

"Ella, can I come in?" I asked knocking on her door. She didn't answer but I needed to talk to her

"I'm coming in" I said opening the door. She was sitting on her bed.

"Ella I am sorry I wasn't at your play. I got caught up in work and I am going to retire soon so I will have all the times. I'm sorry Ella, I really am and I will go to the rest of the shows and be there. I swear on my life, I promise" I begged trying to get her attention. She didn't say anything, not even bothering to look up.

"Ella please say something" I cried out. I want to know her I'm sorry and this won't happen again

"Close the door on the way out" she pointed to the door. I sighed and got up, walking to the door

"I'm sorry" I said walking out of the door and closing it. I tried pushing back the tears, I really tried but I wasn't able to. I rushed to my room and let out a sob.

God I hate myself, I thought I could contain my emotions, keep it in tact but I'm not able to.

"Mommy" Anthony knocked and opened my door. I wiped the tears and fanned my face to dry my eyes

"Come in" I said patting my eyes

"Why are you sad?" He questioned

"I'm not ant man, these are happy tears" I exclaimed

"Happy tears, why happy tears?" He questioned

"Just cause, anyway how was your day?" I changed the subject shaking my head

"It was good, but I don't understand math" he sighed

"Come on, I'll help you" I smile, waving my hand to come. He ran off to his room and brought back his folder and a pencil. Teaching Anthony math is something it involved a lot of cookies and yelling and crying from both of us. I have trauma from sitting with my dad at the kitchen counter and yelling at each other. My mom had to break us up and force my dad to go to bed while she tried to teach me but that didn't go well and more crying was involved and then my parents decided to get me a tutor.

We spent the whole day hanging out and I tried sleeping but I wasn't able to because of the issue with Ella. I want to give Ella space, but the waiting is killing me and her ignoring me is killing me.

I wish I never had this life, never letting my parents get the food and just eating at home, having them still here and them telling me what to do but if they didn't I wouldn't have my kids, meeting my brothers, my friends, my career, and even meeting Stefan.

I stayed up the whole night thinking where I went wrong in life, picking everything out. I had to grow up a lot quicker than Jenna or Lucas. The drug abuse at a young age, parents passing away at the age of 16 and being moved to a whole new state and having to move out at the age of 18 and on my own again.

My psychiatrist has told me that I like to fix everyone's problems and not my own in order to cope and make up for everything. She has said that I don't like to fix my own problems because it is too much to deal with, I don't like to think about my problems so I fix others.

When the sun started rising I decided to get up and get ready not wanting to dwell anymore. The day went by slow and my thoughts have been consuming me

Maybe I need to be checked into a mental hospital

3 weeks later

It is winter breaks for the kids and Ella has been only talking to me about necessary things like what time she needs to be picked up, when she is leaving and other things. I don't know how to fix it, I went to all of her shows, brought flowers for her to take and walk away. I bought everything she wants for christmas trying to make it up

"Lexie, Ella is going through her teenager phase, we went through that and we were total bitches" Jenna said sitting down with the baby monitor in her hand. She finally had her son named Evan. He is so cute and looks like Jenna a lot which she is very happy about since her daughter looks like Aaron.

"I know but I did everything to make it better, I don't know what to do next." I sighed looking at my drink

"She will come out of this soon, don't worry" she patted my leg and we finished talking. I needed this day to spend it with Jenna and be with her.

As Ella and I become more distant, Stefan and I have gotten closer. He has been helping me and in the beginning I hated it but slowly accepted it. He's been helping me a lot more than I expected and not just with work but with my personal life.

I spent the night at Jenna's and then headed home the next morning and slept a bit more.

"Lexie, can I talk to you?" Stefan approached my bathroom door leaning on it

"Sure" I replied turning around and took at him

"I know we have been getting better and I still have feelings for you and will always have feelings so I was wondering, will you go on a date with me?" He asked

A/n

Hey guys, hope you liked this chapter. Sorry it took a while and it's short. Do you think she'll say yes? Find out next time, seee you later byeeeeee

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