Caffrey Flashback

Chapter 16: Generations

"Why do you feel guilty about their relationship?"

Henry ran his hands through his hair, and then paced in front of the sofa as he talked. "When I came to New York in January, I realized that Neal's nightmares and flashbacks were getting worse. It seemed to be caused by finding a father figure he finally trusted, someone who broke through Neal's defenses. I knew if Peter acknowledged Neal as a son, it would give Neal new defenses for a while. But it places Peter inside those defenses, in a position to take advantage of Neal." He looked up at Noelle, aware that the pleading in his voice was likely echoed in his face, "I never believed he would do it. I'd never have given Peter that key if I thought he'd use it that way. I should have checked in on Neal more often, come back up here again to see things for myself instead of believing him when he said everything was fine. I..." He paused, realizing Noelle was repeating his name.

"Henry, enough!" Noelle stood, put her hands on her son's shoulders, and pushed. "Sit down and calm down." She refilled her glass of water and then returned to sit beside Henry. "It's never easy with you. You're too smart for your own good. Half the time I don't know whether to berate you or congratulate you, and tonight is no exception."

Henry treated her to an honest grin. "Let's start with the congratulations."

"Very well." Noelle tucked her feet under her, turning on the sofa to face Henry. "It would seem you helped Peter and Neal acknowledge a very powerful bond. What I witnessed on Sunday wasn't something I'd categorize as manipulation. Peter appeared deeply worried, unsure about whether calling Neal son would work, and relieved when it did. I'd describe it as something rare and beautiful."

"That's an aunt speaking, not a therapist. Beautiful, really," Henry teased.

"I'm allowed to be an aunt occasionally. No." She shook her head before Henry could respond. "You don't have to say it. Neal needs a professional therapist more than he needs an aunt right now. I underestimated how quickly he'd make his way into my heart, but for now I can and will continue to keep those roles separate. As an aunt, I thought it was beautiful. As a therapist, I see it as ephemeral."

"You think Peter's going to change his mind about Neal?"

Noelle sighed. "I think that Neal is making up for missed opportunities. When he's dealt with his childhood issues, he'll want a different kind of relationship with his father figure."

"Hopefully not what I have with Robert."

"No, your relationship with your father is never going to be what it should be, and that's something else we need to discuss. But think about what you have with Graham. You'll always be a beloved grandchild in his eyes, but he also treats you as an equal, as a business partner in Win-Win. Even as you acknowledge Graham has more experience and you try to learn from him, you relish the respect he gives you. That's where Neal's relationship with Peter should move, ideally – to the mutual respect and affection of adult peers where it is acknowledged that one is the more senior."

Henry put his feet up on the coffee table. "That sounds boring and clinical, but I get it. And now's when you berate me?"

"Not yet. First I have to tell you how pleased I am to see how much you care about Neal. After I filed for the divorce, you became so distant and self-contained. I started to worry you'd never open yourself up to that kind of friendship."

"I'd describe the Neal the same way when I found him in Chicago. Determined to take care of himself and not to make any connections that could hurt him. But he couldn't help trusting me. It was almost instinctive. It surprised us both."

"He may have remembered you, at some level. When the Marshals took him away, you tried to protect him. You were screaming at them to bring him back. That would have been a powerful memory – of the last person who tried to save him before he was uprooted and eventually abused. I'm happy for both of you that you have this friendship." She paused.