Dark Winds | Sanemi Shinazugawa x Female Reader

𝐎𝐋𝐃 𝐅𝐑𝐈𝐄𝐍𝐃

"Alright! You're good as new!" Shinobu told me with her cheeky smile.

"Thank you!" I told her, grateful for her help.

I walked  out of her office, finally feeling like myself for the first time in two weeks. The only thing I couldn't stop doing, was going to visit Rengoku. I knew it probably wasn't healthy, but it was the only thing keeping me from continuing to cry about it.

As I walked through the halls of the Butterfly mansion, my mind was somewhere else, and thanks to my distraction, I ran into somebody.

My face, met a familiar set of abs.

"Hey, watch where you're goi-" Sanemi said, not realizing it was me.

"Oh, sorry..." I mumbled walking away quickly. He was literally the last person on this forsaken world that I wanted to see.

"Hey! (Y/n)!" He called out, but I ignored him. I wasn't ready to face him.

Sure, everything I said to him he deserved. But I couldn't help but feel guilty for all the mean things I said. I wasn't ever a rude person, and I hated that he probably saw me that way, regardless.

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I kept a basket by Rengoku's grave, with some of my stuff so that I could hang out longer. I had a blanket and some books, along with some snacks as well.

Today, I was a little sleepy, so I laid my blanket out, and rested for a bit. I didn't think I'd actually fall asleep, but the warm rays of the sun showered me, and the breeze sang a gentle song that lulled me to sleep.

"Boy problems, huh?"  Said that fiery, familiar voice that never failed to make me feel better.

"Kyojuro?" I asked, seeing the Flame Hashira before me. I knew I was dreaming, but why did he seem so real. It was just like my grandmother...

"Sanemi is a toughie, isn't he." Rengoku said laughing, causing me surprise.

"How'd-"

"How did I know?" He said, interrupting me. "I could always tell you had a passion for him, deep within you!"

"You could?" I asked, embarrassed.

"Ha! Of course. But don't worry, my friend. I believe I was the only one that took notice."

"He hates me. What do I do?" I asked desperately.

"No one hates you, (y/n)...Let your heart be free. Live with your head held high!"

"Kyojuro..." I said, completely forgetting about Sanemi.

"Don't be sad, dear friend. My memory will forever live within you. Thank you for coming to see me so often, but the time you waste here, you will never get it back. Don't exhaust your life on an old friend, go make life worth living. You never know how long you, or anyone you love truly has..."

"Kyojuro..." I said, waking myself up. Tears covered my face as I was met with the blinding sun. I continued to sit there, thinking of each word Rengoku had said to me.

That's when it hit me...

I...was just like Sanemi...

I hated him for how he pushed his brother away, when I literally did the same to him.

All that crap about my brain protecting me was all a lie. The same lie Sanemi probably told himself, so that his heart would be safe.

All that shit about Genya blaming him for his mother's death was all just a big cover up.

Sanemi, just wanted to keep his brother out of harm, by pushing him away.

He just wanted Genya to give up, so that he'd never be within the grasp of danger. And I pushed Sanemi away, so that I would never have to deal with the pain of potentially losing him.

I was mad at myself for not realizing sooner, but maybe it was time I actually face him.

I packed up my things, and brought the basket with me this time. I looked at Rengoku'a grave, all the memories I had of him flushing into my head.

I wasn't one of those people who talked to graves, it seemed silly. I would just sit there, and think about his impact on me. But he was right, I did need to accept this fate.

"Thank you, Kyojuro..."

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I walked back to my estate, wondering how I would ever apologize to Sanemi. He did call my name when I saw him earlier, and I wondered what he could possible want.

He was probably just gonna tell me to fuck off..

That's when thoughts of how he used to treat me as his Tsuguko filled my head.

The first day I trained with him, he refused to show me around, and acted like he was strictly business. He complained about how I was taking up his time to train, since he couldn't spar with me yet due to the fact that I "wasn't at his level".

I thought about all the stories Mitsuri told me about her time training with Rengoku, how they'd have fun, and go out to eat, along with training.

Did Sanemi not even want to give me a chance? Or did he just never want to form a bond he couldn't handle losing?

The only person he seemed to get along with was Obanai.

Maybe I could ask him...