The Wings of the Beautifully Fallen

Chapter 19: Reginald

Chapter 19: Reginald

There are no words to describe the feelings of being home after a journey such as I had. First, being taken away to meet the eldest daughter of a king that no one really knew or likes. Then falling for her and discovering she was my Singer, the woman I was destined to be with, yet still afraid of me. After that, having to go and attempt to help settle the unrest in another kingdom with no idea when or if I would see Illiana again.

My eyes squinted as I looked down, watching the kingdom grow closer as my wings carried me through the wind, my hair waving wildly as my clothes billowed around me. The gentle glow of the evening sun bathed the land in front of me and I found myself wanting Illiana to see this as well.

I needed to know her, to understand why she was so afraid of me, of everyone. There would be very few chances for me to return there, especially if her father was going to be difficult. And I just had this feeling deep in me stomach that he would do anything to keep me away from her.

Why was I such a fool? Why did I not attempt to hold onto to her when I had the chance. To give her an escape, a safe place away from whatever caused her to have that fear? That was what I should have done but I had chose that it would have been better to allow her to stay there, to stay where she would not be safe.

"Is something bothering you?" My father's deep voice interrupted my thoughts and I turned my gaze towards him, the wind pounding in my ear. "It could not be Princess Illiana, could it?"

My jaw tightened in annoyance as I turned away, unable and unwilling to look at my father. It was no secret that the two of us were close, especially after he had named me his heir, but sometimes I still wished that he could not read me so easily. Then again, perhaps it was a good thing that he could, at least for now, so I could be saved from explaining the conflicting feelings inside.

"Not regretting asking her father for his blessing in your marriage are you?" Father questioned, his vibrant red wings flickering in the wind as he flew beside me. "After all, you were the one who said that you did not want to force Princess Illiana to be with you, even though she was your Singer."

"I know what I said, Father. And I still stand by that." How could I not? The memory of when I had asked her for her hand, she seemed so terrified, as if marriage was the worst thing in the world. Even now, away from her and the cold atmosphere of her home, I still could not understand it. She was different and thought oddly about something that the other women seemed to love immensely. So why could she not see the same things? Or in the same way? What could have happened to her?

The sad part is, there was still a part of me, a rather big part, that wondered if her father had anything to do with her actions. If he was the reason that she was so afraid of me. It was a feeling, but a strong one. And now, I may never find out and I may never see her again.

"Sometimes, my son, you spend to much time worrying about others and not enough about yourself. You need to consider what would make you happy." Father's voice was calm and non-judgmental, but it was an argument that I had heard many times before. An attribute that a good king needs, as he would say, is to care about all of your people and do what is best for them. However, sometimes one needs to remember that they also have needs and desires, but this was not just about me. It was about her as well. It was our life together, no one else. So it should be a choice that we decide on our own.

"I understand what you are saying, but things are slightly different with marriage. It is not about one person, but two. Two who will spend the rest of their lives together. Create a family." I took a deep breath as my eyes watched the world rush by underneath. "How could I be happy with someone, Singer or not, if they were afraid of me? Eventually that fear will turn to hate and disgust and neither of us could ever be happy."