comfort person // lesbian story (intersex x girl)

14.

Viviana's POV

"Hey pretty girl" I said pulling my chair close to Katie's chair. She kept writing something down and I didn't look at it in case she didn't want me to.

"You're not allowed to call me that" she said putting her pen down and closing her notebook "what? Pretty girl?" I asked her and she nodded, interlocking her fingers together and placing them on her lap "yes. Jenny said no one is allowed to call me things other than my name because she's the only one allowed to do it"

"She said that?" I asked raising my eyebrows. She nodded her head and I sat back on the chair "yes, she also said that it will be my fault if someone says it because I didn't stop them the first time" she said. I don't like what I'm hearing.

"What else did she do? Forbid you from wearing crop tops?" I said laughing a little. I meant it as a joke but she nodded her head "she said I can't wear a crop top or a skirt unless I'm with her"

I'm gonna have a little talk with Jenny later.

"Why are you listening to her? What she's saying is not fucking okay. She can't control the way you dress or what you fucking like. That's not what a relationship is like" I said sitting up and looking at her as I talked "I have never had a relationship. I do not know how it works" she said innocently.

This is making me mad because I feel like Jenny is taking the fact that Katie has never been in a relationship before as an advantage so she would make herself feel more powerful and more controlling over a pure person that just wants to make the person they're with happy.

"a healthy relationship is trusting your partner, letting them wear whatever they want and letting them do whatever they want. I would personally like to know about what my girlfriend would be doing but I won't stop her from doing it. I would want her to have fun and I know that she's not going to cheat if I trust her. A healthy relationship is built with trust and love"

"What about sex? Is it a very important thing in a relationship?" She asked, looking up at me for a split second then looking away "no or to me at least. I like sex, I love it but if my girlfriend doesn't want to have sex that doesn't make me like her less or want her less. I don't date a person for their body, sex is a great bonus in relationships but I wouldn't mind if my girlfriend wasn't ready yet"

She nodded her head and smiled a little "your future girlfriend will be very lucky to have you" she said making me smile but it died after a few seconds because my head went back to her question about sex "did Jenny force you to have sex with her? Did she say that she'll break up with you if you don't have sex with her?"

I will kill that mother fucker if she said that.

Sex is amazing but love is even better. Who wants sex when they can have love. When I think of someone I like, like Katie I think about how I would treat her, what I would do on our dates, how I will try to make her happy not about how I'll be fucking her or some shit.

I truly just want to show love but I'm scared that I'll show it in a bad way if I felt loved by the person in front of me. I'm scared I'll react in a bad way seeing someone treat me well and actually love me for who I truly am.

That's why I'm trying to push my feelings away because I don't want to hurt Katie. I don't feel like I'm in my best state to be able to treat her like the queen she is. I want to, I just think there is someone that'll do it better than me and she deserves everything good.

"Would it be weird if I asked Jenny to be my girlfriend now?" She asked me. I tried my best to not let that affect me, I tried to not get upset by what she said but it was hard.

Just give her some advice.

"No, definitely not. It'll scare her away" I would've loved if Katie asked me to be her girlfriend from the first few weeks of us dating, I just didn't want Jenny to live my dream.

Sounds cheesy and weird, I know but imagine calling Katie your girlfriend? That's like..Lizeth Selene kissing my cheek. Not that it'll ever happen, which is why both things are similar.

"Really?" She sounds disappointed, oh no.

"Do you really want her to be your girlfriend?" I asked her. I want her to say no but I know it won't happen "no" Never mind, it just happened.

"Then why do you want to ask her to be your girlfriend?" I asked her trying to hide the smile that started to form on my lips after I heard her say no "because I thought it would make her hang out with me more which will make me like her more. I like her a little now but she doesn't hang out with me a lot"

"Listen.." I wanted to tell her something for real now "..don't ask her to be your girlfriend if you don't want her to be your girlfriend. I understand that you don't fully know how relationships work but let me tell you, that's not how they work"

"Okay, I'm sorry" I shook my head and put my hand on her cheek "it's okay, don't apologize. I'm not trying to shame you for not knowing, I'm trying to teach you so it's okay. There is absolutely nothing to apologize for"

She smiled and moved her face on my hand softly making me smile at how cute she is. Sometimes physical touch is exactly what she needs but she just wants someone to give her the exact amount that she wants, at the exact time that she wants and I'm lucky enough to be a person that she likes to be touched by.

"I want to get a job" she said. I nodded my head "I just got hired again at Starbucks just in another place. I'm sure I can find you a space to work with me..if you want of course" I really wanted her to say yes because that means I get to spend more time with her.

"Okay. Thank you"