Our Story. // Skephalo // Book One

Chapter V [5] - Is This What Love Feels Like?

Skeppy's POV:

While Bad was in the bathroom, Skeppy went to look at more the fanart that Bad had drawn. "Wow, I knew he could make really cute builds in minecraft, but I never knew he could paint." Skeppy observed the drawings for a little bit, admiring the paint strokes and mini descriptions. As he looked through the fanart, he found a piece of paper that looked like it had been sitting on the bottom for a while. "Hm, what's this?" He put the fanart aside and picked up the paper with a bunch of writing on it. He examined the paper and tried to comprehend what Bad was trying to say. 

[The italic font shows what the paper says]

Day 43

Dear diary, 

It's me, Darryl, writing yet again. So many emotions are going through my head right now, I don't know how to fix it. I can't let them out infront of  Skeppy, I don't want him to be upset with me, and I don't want to make him uncomfortable. This feeling, it's something i've never felt before. I know he's coming to visit for a little bit, but I just can't mess this up. I don't even know what to do, he's my best friend, I can't lose him over love. I hope he gets here safely, I don't want him to get hurt. I don't know what to do, and if I don't tell him then i'll go insane, but if I do, then our friendship might come to an end. 

There are so many stressful things happening right now, and I know i'm not supposed to be thinking any of this, but I just can't help it. Every time I talk to him, I can feel it growing stronger. I  don't know how to tell him, I just can't let him find this. If he does then...well I have no idea what he'll think of me. I have to make his visit the best visit there is, as long as I don't lose it infront of him. 

Heh, this is probably getting long, I just need somebody who can listen to me, kind of like a human diary. I can only hope that he doesn't see this. If he does, i'm sorry. 

Skeppy held back his tears as he put the paper underneath the fanart. "Wow I- I never knew he felt like that.." Skeppy let out a sigh as he distracted himself with more fanart. Just as he grabbed another picture that Bad had painted, Bad cam out of the bathroom. Bad then told him that he's made lots of fanart, he just hasn't posted any. "You know if you're a simp, you can just say it." Bad let go of his hand and went to his room. 

"I messed this up, I made him upset..." Skeppy said tto himself. "Why the f*** did I say that?!" Tears started to build up as he sat back down. "He did all of this for me, and I just made it worse." He put his head down on the table and started to cry. "How could I be so stupid.." He asked himself. "Why am I like this..? Maybe I shouldn't have come here at all." He lifted his head and got himself up from the seat. He saw a picture of him and Bad together, fan made of course and saw how happy both of them were. He started to blush as he saw more art pieces that Bad had made. He kept looking through fanart until he stumbled upon another diary piece. 

Day 44

Dear Diary,

It's me, again. Today's the day he'll come and visit me. I just hope it all works out and that I don't lose it. I can't let him know about any of this, I feel like i'm just putting on a smile to hide what is really going on. This, this just isn't who I am, this isn't who I want to be. It's for his sake, I can't let  this happen, I just..can't. He's one of the only people I have left, I don't want to ruin this for him. 

I'll just have to act happy infront of him at all times. I know it'll make me sound fake, but it's the best decision I have, isn't it? There are so many times where I just want to tell him that I love him so much, but it'd make things awkward between us, wouldn't it?  Gosh I..I don't know what to do. Maybe he won't notice it, hopefully he doesn't.

Zak doesn't deserve to see me in pain, he just doesn't. I just need to keep a happy face, that's all I gotta do..right?

He paused for a moment, trying to understand what he was saying. "I need to go talk to Bad." He said, as he grabbed the 2 diary entrees and went to his room. When he saw Bad, they both locked eyes for a few seconds. Bads' eyes were a little red, which meant that he had been crying for a bit. There was a moment of silence before he spoke. "Skeppy, what're you doing in here?" He said, quickly wiping his tears off his face. Skeppy started to tear up as he walked over and showed him the diary entrees he found whilst looking at the fanart. "Want to explain these?" He said pushing them onto the bed. Bad grabbed the papers and put them behind him. "You weren't supposed to find these." He said, as he felt a slight panic enter his body. Skeppy started to cry as he managed to get a few words out. "Why didn't you tell me..." Skeppy put himself on Bad and started to cry. Bad rubbed Skeppy's back as he tried to calm him down. 

"Skeppy, I didn't tell you because I didn't want to hurt you. I was trying to protect you." Bad started to tear up as he spoke. "You weren't supposed to see those, I was going to tell you at some point, I just-" His sentence was interrupted by Skeppy as he pulled away from him. "Bad, you're my best friend, you can tell me anything." He wiped his tears away and began to speak again. "Can we please discuss them? I know it doesn't make you feel as comfortable, but it needs to be addressed."

Bad sighed as he grabbed Skeppy's hands and held them tight. "Skeppy, I love you. This type of love, it's something I haven't felt before. I really mean it this time." Skeppy looked at Bad in the eyes, in shock of what had just happened. "Bad I-" He was interrupted by Bad hugging him tightly. "I love you too, Bad, in the way that you love me." 

So it was official, they both loved each other in a way nobody could understand. They both decided to keep it a secret for a little bit. Bad had fallen asleep in his arms, which made Skeppy giggle a bit. He whispered to himself "Hm, I guess i'm a BadBoyHalo simp now." He gently lifted Bad up and covered him with his blankets. "I love you, you muffinhead. Sleep tight." 

He had exited the room, gently shutting the door. He decided that he'd write in his own diary. He found some paper, grabbed a pen and started to write. 

Day 1

Dear Diary,

This is my first time writing in one, I can see why people do it now. Today was..something to say the least. I never would've guessed that Bad actually loved me, I thought we'd just be best friends. I'll admit, I loved him as well, I was just too afraid to say anything about it. So many emotions ran through my head, and it was very hard to say anything without making it awkward. There were so many times where I wanted to admit it, but I just couldn't. 

I should've known that I could just confess to him, he's my best friend, and best friends are always there for each other, no matter what happens. I can't believe we both had the same fears of what could happen, 2 great minds think alike i assume. I've only been gone for 10 minutes and yet i still miss bad, even though he's in the room next to me. 

You know, this feeling is great. Feeling like you can rely on somebody, feeling like you can just talk to them, it's remarkable. I've never felt this way before, but I always knew that there was  something different about him.

 I guess this is what love feels like, isn't it? Feeling like you can be with somebody that you can trust, somebody you can open up to, kind of like this diary except, well, human. Love is a great feeling, and I can't wait to see what the future holds. 

Signed,

Zak [Bad's Muffin]