The True Saint

Love & War

"Alright," the Darkling says.

"Aleksander!" I gasp.

"Kneel," Grimjer demands. The Darkling does not get down on his knees. Through the chaos, I do not see one of the Drüskelle come behind the Darkling. Before I can cry out, the man stabs Aleksander in the stomach. He is forced to the ground with a grunt of pain.

Something is awoken inside me when I see Aleksander injured at the hand of the Drüskelle. It can only be described as a dark, concentrated rage and hatred. I have forgotten about my throbbing head, broken ribs, and bleeding neck. I only see the man that I love hunched over in pain with helpless eyes. Yes, the man I love. I love him. I thought that he was inhuman, but it was me that shoved my feelings down into a deep, dark place for no one to see.

I feel unimaginable power rush to the surface. The beast that has been sleeping for so long has finally awoken from its slumber. This time, I do not push it back down. I let it free. A violent explosion of light is emitted from me. It is enough to instantly melt the chains encircling my wrists. Grimjer has been thrown up against the wall from the surge of energy. The Darkling takes the chance to get up and emerge the Drüskelle into darkness. The shadows fall away a moment later with no remnants of the men besides their weapons that clang to the floor. I can finally take a full breath of air after holding it for so long.

        Just when I think it is finally over, I hear the metal chink of a rifle being reloaded. Grimjer has gotten up and found a fallen weapon of one of his dead men. "Goodbye, demjin." The barrel raises to the Darkling's chest and everything seems to move in slow motion. I feel the same rage-driven power bloom within me. Almost like it is second nature, my hands raise in an arc motion. The Cut is sent slicing through the air targeting Grimjer and disarming him before he can take the shot. Then, all becomes quiet.

When the rage and adrenaline dissipate, I stare at the fallen corpse before me. I did this. Without thought, I used the Cut on a person. He was a horrible, deranged one, but still a person nonetheless. I stand there numbed by shock. I feel the Darkling grab my shoulders and shake me, but I cannot look away from the atrocity that I was responsible for.

"Alina." He squeezes my arm, but I cannot bring myself to look away from the mutilated king. "Alina," he coaxes in a soothing voice. "Look at me." Aleksander grabs my chin. "Not him. Me." I finally shift my eyes to look into his.

"I... killed him"

He caresses my face and says in a low tone, "Alina, you saved me."

        After a long moment of silence, I find my voice and ask, "Why did you come for me when you knew it was perilous?"

He looks at me and considers the question. "Because I love you, Alina." I look at him in disbelief. I thought his affection was just because he did not want to be alone. I could not believe that he actually loved me. The Darkling in love? I let his words sink in.

"Why didn't you let him kill me?" He asks in return.

There is a moment of silence where we look into the other's eyes. Why didn't I let Grimjer kill Aleksander? The Alina from a few months ago would have let him. I ponder this for a moment only to draw one simple and true conclusion.

"Because I love you too."

        He stands there, searching my eyes to see if I am telling the truth, although the connection says it all. The tether is exploding with emotions, but the one that triumphs over all is love. The most beautiful and strong emotion that has come through the tether thus far. He leans forward, but I take the initiative by clutching his shirt and pulling him into a long, alleviating kiss. I have shared many kisses before—many with him—but this one seems to open an unknown part of my heart that sends butterflies throughout my entire body.

        When we depart, he moves a piece of my stained hair from my face and begins to examine my injuries with gentle hands. I must be a sight to see with colored bruises and red blood staining my tangled white hair, a thin cut on my throat. Fatigue rears its head as the adrenaline wears off entirely. "Let's get you home," he mutters and places a kiss on my forehead. Aleksander is still clutching his stomach where he was injured, but he wraps his other arm around me and holds me close as if he will never let go again.

        We walk out of the bunker, holding each other up as we go. When we turn the corner of the long, underground hallway, I flinch when I see a cluster of nichevo'ya waiting for their next order. It is odd seeing them just stand there without movement. It is a nice change as opposed to them constantly trying to grab or bite me. They are still crawling with wrongness, however. I tense up and shiver as we walk past them through the path that they have created. The Darkling holds me close, noticing my discomfort. "It is alright. I control them," he reminds.

        When the door connecting the bunker to the outdoors is opened, light bursts through the opening. It is blinding at first and I realize how long I have been down there with only an oil lamp for light. When I grow accustomed to the daylight, I begin to feel relaxed once more, letting the sun's rays soak into my skin. My complexion turns back to its golden glow almost instantly and I take a full breath of fresh air.

        There is no wind and the snow sparkles in the sun. Icicles hang from the willow trees and sway slightly, resembling a crystal chandelier. It is perfect.

        We walk back to his black carriage and collapse on the cushions immediately. Every bump on the journey back sends a jolt of pain through my body. My head pulses and my ribcage brings a thunderbolt of sharp discomfort. Aleksander is always there to stroke my hair and lull me back to sleep.

        My dreams consist of a handsome prince who comes to save me, however, it turns out to be me who saves him. We proclaim our love for each other and hold one other on the way back to our beloved kingdom. When I wake up from my beautiful dream, I realize that it was not a dream. I look up at the Darkling, who is sleeping soundly with his lips parted slightly. I smile and lay my head back down on his chest, letting sleep take me for the remainder of the trip and I return to the dream of the stunning prince and princess who live happily ever after. Unfortunately, happily ever after is not an intent of the real world. But a Queen can dream.