Acrylic Waves (Bk 1)

X. Tacet

I walked around the small island in the middle of my kitchen. The kettle on the stovetop whistled as I took it off the stove, pouring the boiling water into my mug. Xenelis still wasn't back, although she had messaged me that she was coming home. I watched the tea leaves swirl as the water fell into the cup. Something seemed wrong earlier, but she said she would explain at home. I can only guess at what she and Team Z.I.T. were up to in the last few hours. The four of them had worried me sick. 

I remove my admin helmet, my purple-tinted vision reverting back to what is commonly referred to as a typical color spectrum. I set the article on the counter within easy reach if one of the hermits barges in. I sigh, planting my fists on the granite. I check my communicator to see if Xen needs any sort of help.

An image flashes through my mind. I look at my hands. No. This can't be happening. I bite back tears, shaking my head to clear them. The image goes away, only to be replaced by another one. I squeeze my eyes shut, concentrating on shoving all of those emotions down. Another hallucination from my nightmares flashes in my mind. I suppress them. All of them.

A few tears make their way down my face. I wipe them away as quickly as possible. I'm not weak, and I haven't failed anyone. I'm making it up to my sister. I feel the intensity of panic come over me. The terror that everything I've done has somehow killed someone. Emotionally, but also physically. I don't hurt people. People don't want to harm me. I'm as safe as I'll ever be.

You haven't seen Xenelis for so long, and the last time you did, she tried to kill you. Permanently. You don't know if she'll try again. She has an association with the Watchers. She may be under their influence. You know the stories of the masks. The masks allow complete control over a person but are invisible to the player.

I hate the little voices in my head so much sometimes.

My thoughts race, and I can feel my heartbeats getting heavier and faster. Soon, it's like someone installed a sledgehammer inside of my chest. It thumps against my ribcage, trying to get out. I take shorter and shorter breaths, trying and failing to keep up with the pounding. No. No panic attacks are allowed right now.

An inner battle ensues. I fight my own mind, struggling to tell myself that I'm not weak. I'm not in any danger here. I fight against it, slowing my breathing down to one breath every twenty, no thirty, seconds. My heart slows down. I bury my head in my hands. I drink some tea, hoping it will serve my nerves well. There's something magical about tea. It just calms me down, serving as an anchor for my emotions, especially when the admin work is difficult.

I rub my neck. One of the things I get asked most about is managing such a chaotic server. The secret is, I don't. I can't control what happens here at all. There was one incident where Scar called me over to look at something, and when I got there, Grian shot me in the neck with a water gun. Just imagine. You're going about your ordinary admin day, and then you get squirted in the neck with a water gun. The water dripping down my neck into my underclothes was purely uncomfortable.

The point is, I have no control over what the hermits do. This mayoral election? Grian started that because he wants Mumbo to be mayor, something Mumbo still doesn't know he's a part of. My job as the admin is to make sure the server doesn't crash.

I smile, recalling that memory. It's crazy how thinking about the hermits can switch my moods. I take another sip of tea.

A clatter outside alerts me to the presence of another, and I put my helmet on. The door handle turns, and Xenelis walks in, helmet on her head. I noticed a large white bandage around her left arm. She moves tenderly like every movement disturbs the wound. Almost simultaneously, we removed our helmets and set them on the counter. Yellow next to the red. Her cheeks are slightly puffy, and she rubs the bandage absentmindedly.

"What happened there?" I ask her. She flinches at my words.

"Void," she answers, not bothering to explain further. However, that single word has set off the alarm bells in my mind.

"What were you doing with the Void?"

"Zedaph wanted a hole through the bedrock and Impulse made one for him. The Void started calling me and I went into it. It hurt me and Impulse pulled me out. I came home shortly after."

"The sun set several hours ago. What else were you doing?"

"I got lost in the Nether for a little bit. Enraged a couple piglins, fought off a ghast, found a bastion but passed it up. Nothing too dangerous."

"Xen!" I exclaimed. "I thought you were coming straight home! Do you know how worried I've been?" I took a sip of my tea. "You don't even have a proper weapon! You could've been killed!"

"I would have just respawned," she retorts, pain in her eyes. I calm myself. The outburst was probably overwhelming to her.

"Sorry, I shouldn't have yelled. Here," I beckon, "let me see that arm. I'll see if I can do anything about it."

"It's just a Void wound, Xisuma," she mutters, walking around the kitchen island to where I am. "There isn't really anything you can do about it. It won't heal with potions or anything. On the subject of weapons, however," I look into her eyes. She is dead serious. "Do you know where my swords, Silence and Tacet are?"

"Yes, but I don't know if I can give them to you."

"I need to be able to protect myself, you know."

"I can give you one of them, but both may be a danger to the server." I walk over to my enderchest, pulling out two diamond katanas. I see Galactic runes engraved on each blade spelling out their names. I wonder what they say. More importantly, I'm wondering where she learned the language of the Watchers. I know she has some relationship, but I'm not sure what. One of the swords is a slightly deeper teal, leaning towards dark blue, almost violet in some spots. Reading the enchantments, like I have done a thousand times, I can see that this dark one is the more deadly of the two swords.

"Can I have Tacet? It's the lighter one."

I hand her the lighter sword. "So, that's what the runes say," I say, voicing my thoughts. "I was wondering about that. Where did you learn to write in the forbidden language of the Watchers?"

Xen flinches. I was right in thinking she has some sort of relationship with them. She looks very uncomfortable while saying, "I genuinely don't like talking about it. Can we just leave the past in the past?"

I nod, understanding. I put the other sword in the enderchest as she sheaths Tacet and straps it on her back. She takes the scabbard for Silence and puts it in the enderchest, her expression mournful. I grab her hand, pulling her in for a hug. The loss of a trusted weapon, even for the best, is always hard.

The two of us spend a quiet evening together before going to bed. Xen goes outside, presumably to be in a build she made earlier. I allow her to go. Based on the enchantments, nothing can harm her. I am about to go into my room, but my communicator buzzes. The ping shows that a minor bug is causing a glitch in many hermits' industrial districts. The lag caused can be fatal, so I sit down at the counter to work on it. No sleep for me tonight.