Night of Secrets (Night of Secrets #1)

Chapter 15 - Letting It Out

I turn to Cyril. "To be honest, you've been the nicest to me, but that doesn't mean you were actually a decent person. I actually did think we could be friends, but it's pretty obvious you don't care all that much about me. If you did, you would've done something about everything you knew. But you never did. Thanks for all the things you did for me sophomore year, and you're welcome for all the help I gave you whether you want to acknowledge it or not. Maybe I did actually like and care about you at some point, but frankly, I dodged a bullet."

Finally, I turn to Faye. "You were never my best friend. You are the single most selfish person I've ever met. You never cared about me or anyone else for that matter. It was all about you for as long as I've known you. And when it was about me, it was all about why I wasn't good enough the way I was. I don't know why you thought you had any right to tell me I should eat less or talk to certain people or be a certain way, but I wish I never had the displeasure of hearing you say all that or having you in my life for even a nanosecond. I'm even wondering why anyone is your friend."

I take a deep breath and glance at all of them. They're either staring at me or the letters at our feet. "That was the short version," I leer. "If you want to hear more, the letters are right there."

With that, I turn on my heels and walk the rest of the way to the diner, not bothering to look back. The farther away from them I get, the taller I stand. I feel a smile spread across my face even when the adrenaline rush starts to disappear.

I actually did that... After three years I finally said something... I press a hand flat against my chest. It feels so...light. It's been years since I've felt this light. Three years to be exact.

But there's something else weighing down on me, and that's my fight with Jax. Just thinking about it makes my smile waver until it's completely gone. At this point, I push the diner's door open. Mira is behind the counter and glances up when I walk in. Her eyes flicker past me, but when she sees I'm alone, her eyebrows furrow.

"Where's Jax?" she asks.

"Yeah..." I lift myself onto a stool, clasping my hands on the counter. "About that..."

I tell her about everything that happened tonight, keeping the places we were at to myself. But I tell her the other details, especially every conversation I had with Jax and the ones I had with other people, too. By the time I get to my fight with Jax and my confrontation with Dean, Faye, and Cyril, I'm on my feet pacing back and forth.

"You had an eventful night," is all Mira says.

"I know that." I pause, resting my hands on my head. "I need you to tell me what to do now. You're always good about that."

"Well, first, I'm glad you realized what a true friend is, and I'm proud of you for having the courage to leave that toxic friend group. Second, I know Jax was being insensitive about the entire thing, but he was the one that pushed you to do what you needed to do."

I drop my hands to my side and drag my feet back towards the counter. "So you think I'm in the wrong?"

"No. It definitely wasn't as easy to walk away as Jax implied. It sounds like he knew that, but he just got caught up in his emotions. But I think you should still thank him for encouraging you to realize you deserved better and watching out for you as best he could all these years."

I settle on the stool, holding my head in my hands. "Do you think he even wants to hear from me at this point?"

Mira bursts out laughing. When I stare at her, she sobers, arching an eyebrow. "Adeline, are you serious? You do realize how much Jax likes you, right?"

I drop my hands on the counter. "Wait... did you know about that?"

Mira nods. "He told me a few years ago. That's part of the reason why I suggested you guys share secrets. I was hoping he would tell you."

"But what if he doesn't feel the same anymore after our fight?"

Mira smiles, reaching out to tuck my hair behind my ear. "Adeline, Jax isn't like Dean, Faye, and Cyril. He's not gonna change his mind about you because of one fight. And he's not gonna throw it in your face. I think we both know you can trust Jax. And if you're having doubts, you should take a look at the pictures you guys took tonight. You might find some answers there."

I take out my phone and place it on the counter. I have eight unopened texts from Jax. When I open his messages, all the pictures we took tonight are there. In all the pictures, there's always a genuine smile on Jax's face, like he's just happy to be there with me. When I look closer, I realize he's not looking at the camera in any of the pictures. He's glancing at me. Every single time.

If I learned anything tonight, it's that Jax really cares about me. Even when we weren't exactly the best friends we used to be. And I care about him just as much. If that's the case, then a fight really shouldn't break us apart. I had a reason to say what I did to him, but I know he meant well this entire night. It's not just blind optimism either. It's a fact.

"You like him a lot, too, don't you?" Mira asks, drawing my attention away from the pictures.

"Well, yeah," I admit. "I'd be insane not to like someone that cares about me this much."

"So what are you waiting for? Go find him and tell him that."

"Okay, I will." Mira smiles. I wonder how long she's been waiting for this to happen. Maybe I'll ask someday. But for now... "Do you have a pen and paper?"